A Gentleman's Game Played By Hooligans

Brandon Clements : :(

I'll take a hiding like that a couple of times if Lambert and the team learn from it. The exception being that a) it's a pretty heavy defeat, b) we're playing Spurs in a few days and c) there's a reasonably high chance we're playing Chelsea again in a few weeks.

If I were Lambert, I'd just put the scoreline up in the locker room and dare the team to take it down.

Ahaha

Ronaldo congratulates Messi

Messi's outfits at those things are historically atrocious.

Would hae liked to see Iniesta win. Go Swans!

Everything wrong about Britain? Football.

A piece about the rules and regulations of club ownership in Britain.

• MLS SuperDraft is today
• That's still a stupid name
• DC draft Taylor Kemp, a defender
• Unrelated: Portland paying Kris Boyd to go away buying out Kris Boyd's contract

Having seen this



I'm confident FrankA will enjoy this



Or perhaps if that's too much work, this



Both were posted by the same user at SA, but I'm assuming based on the wildly different amount of effort and different hosting sites in use that he made neither.

That chart is so fucking Rangers.

Oh dear.

A 19-year old woman is alleging sexual assault against four men, which would not normally be a topic for this thread, except that they're Brighton players and one of them is Brendan Rodgers' son.

The details, if true, are pretty horrid: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/fo...ssaulting-teenage-woman-Old-Bailey-hears.html

Classiest part of this whole thing: she didn't tell the full story for six months, fearing repercussions, and eventually went to the police with details because she was repeatedly taunted by another player about the matter.

This Eden Hazard ballboy-kicking thing keeps getting funnier and funnier. First, I think everyone is at this point aware that the kid is fine and is letting it go, that isn't really the issue. But hilariously, a ton of people are speaking up to defend Hazard's actions as reasonable. The football thread on another forum I frequent is currently full of Hazard apologists claiming his actions were justified because the ball boy was "being a little shit" who "wouldn't do his job." As of today you can also add Harry Redknapp to the list of apologists. Not that anyone ought to give a fuck what Harry Redknapp thinks since he and the team he is now managing are in no way involved. But since when has that had any bearing on whether he inserts himself into the (fully welcoming) press?

To be clear, this is absolutely a tempest in a teacup. The kid is fine, and spoke to Hazard, who apologized; he isn't pressing charges, his own club is downplaying it, and the matter is pretty much resolved. I am just in awe of the extent to which people are prepared to rationalize bad behavior in the name of sport.

It's a tough one. One angle makes it look like he's intent on giving the boy a beating. The other makes it look like he accurately toe-punts the ball and that's the extent of the incident.

I have been surprised how much the "football community" has backed Hazard, though. Ultimately I agree with the Football Weekly stance, i.e. it was fucking hilarious and they're both idiots but no harm was done.

I prefer to think of it as symptomatic of that club's culture and what it can do to even the nicest Belgian... oh whatever.

http://www.whoateallthepies.tv/live...xtraordinary-faces-of-luis-suarez-photos.html

NOT BAD

Scottish football wobbles closer to reconstruction.

So I was talking this past week with FrankA and said that if Villa don't get at least a point against Newcastle I thought we would go down.

We didn't. I've got a bad feeling that I'm going to have a hard time next year finding a stream.

FrankA does not like this.

C'mon Lambo. Pull it together man. It's not that hard, buy an experienced Petrov replacement and get some leadership out there.

I have a good buddy who's a Newcastle fan and his happiness means more to me than that of Brandon Clements. Sorry Brandon.

Of course, the way West Ham has been playing, maybe I better reserve my concern for my own side.

I liked Lambert as a player and think he's a good manager, but he just looks _lost_ at the moment.

It's actually fairly unpleasant to watch.

And if Benteke gets poached by Man City it's curtains imo.

How come the game rigging scandal isn't getting much traction? Or is it that it's just breaking? I was pretty surprised when someone told me about it.

It's just recently broken. I'm sure more people will care when Europol starts to leak more details of substance.

Word. I meant to see if I could find more info today because I just heard it mentioned last night, but I forgot until I saw this thread. On a more positive note, I'm probably too much amused by a club in League 2 going by the name "Fighting Cods".

From what I've seen it's getting traction in the UK because of Liverpool being involved. Oh English sports media, never change.

More seriously, another day, another incident of racism in football with Milan VP's comment on Balotelli. It looks like 2013 is shaping up much to be like 2012, and with turds like Blatter and Platini running things I doubt any serious change will happen.

I'm very interested in the match-fixing thing, but as FrankA says, there's just no information yet. That and, I mean, what can comment on that really look like? Oh, you're against it? So's everyone.

HES OUR PRODIGAL SON
AND HE HATES THE HUNS



Get in there, Scotland!

Of course the USMNT (lolol) were appalling today. I'm actually sad when Ireland win now, because it means a longer stretch until Trap's inevitable exit.

Some fun facts from Europol:

- They're dropping the investigation. They're handing off details to various local authorities. Probably this means nothing really of consequence will be happening. This may be inevitable as the guy they really want, and his organization, are hiding behind behind money and political favors in Singapore and they are thus unable to reach him.

- Fixing is not just about results. Asian gambling houses allow bets on all kinds of weird stuff. At least one person says he was paid to fix the time of the first throw-in. (He fucked it up.)

- It isn't just players, of course. Referees, linesmen, etc. have been approached as well.

- A Liverpool match was involved, but not on Liverpool's side. The opposing goalkeeper was bribed to let in three goals. Liverpool were so shit that year that they were able to manage only the one, against a goalkeeper actively trying to allow more.

- MLS is not implicated, that we know of. This may be because no one much cares about MLS; several players have reported being approached by fixers, though. All of the major North American organizations, including MLS, NASL and USL, have said that it would be naïve to think they're immune and are doing everything they can to try to protect their integrity.

- While gambling is at the root of all of this, there have been serious incidents including multiple murders tied to it.

At least one of the Grantland writers thinks "soccer is fucked." (His words.) I didn't live through the Black Sox scandal, I have no idea what moving past something like this is like -- particularly when nothing is resolved, really -- or if it's possible.

Schwiiiiiing

The sheer amount of press coverage of yesterday's debacle is astonishing, but I want to highlight a couple of key things for people who maybe do not follow everything Celtic-minded the way I do.

The first is Lennon's selection of Ambrose. All of Juve's successful attacks came from attacking at Ambrose, not just the two as highlighted in the media. The fact that Scott Brown was back covering for Ambrose, who was woefully out of position on the second goal, does not make it Brown's fault that he got nutmegged.

Two days before the tie Lennon was in the media saying up and down that he would not select Ambrose. Ambrose has been a bombscare even in the SPL, and he had just finished the Cup of Nations ON SUNDAY NIGHT. He only arrived back in Glasgow Tuesday morning. The fact that Lennon even put the question of his fitness to him astonishes me - he was a clear non-choice.

His selection highlights a key issue with Celtic's strategy, recently praised by Kevin McKenna, that needs addressing. The purchasing of under-scouted talent for development and re-sale is fine, but there are certain positions that will cause more problems than others. Buy me all the Gary Hoopers and Emilio Izaguirres you fucking want, Lennon, but pay the fucking money for an experienced, developed center half just fucking once. Our central defense is a rotating door of half-capable useful idiots. Spend the money.

The second talking point is obviously the set piece wrestling. I've seen lots of equivocating about Hooper being equally culpable, which is a load of absolute fucking bollocks. We were due a sending off and a pair of penalties at the least before the first half was concluded, and while I will not stoop to the level of Lennon and call the referee Pro-Juve, I will say that officials need to stop taking the easy action and cautioning both an attacking and defending player on set pieces, or giving a foul on the attacking player.

That push on Scott Brown inside the box was fucking ridiculous, capable of being a second sending off, and the theatric dive afterwards was utter absurdity.

I couldn't see the match because work, was this what it looks like

THAT FUCKING PUSH. GOD FUCKING DAMNIT.

The actual wrestling in the box was so much worse than that, too.

For example:

There really is nothing more loathsome than an Italian soccer player.

hahaha http://www.whitecapsfc.com/loveletters

Bradford fans were fantastic, but man was that a drubbing.

Difficult to begrudge Swansea some silverware though. Fantastic club playing nice football.

On an unrelated note, this is amazing:



I think he might actually be a T-1000.

Absolutely. I love watching Swansea. Thanks for all the Ki money, suckers! He's doing much better down there anyway.

MEANWHILE IN FRANCE

So this guy writes the standard "LOL soccer is boring" editorial. That's fine, and mildly amusing. And then, near the end, after accusing soccer of being all kinds of boring, he admits to enjoying baseball.

'Loosening the offside rule would help'

ahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

"I just hope U.S. soccer's growth doesn't unleash the same violent passions and hooliganism that sometimes erupt in Europe and Latin America."

We come from different worlds, you and I.

Just read that a few minutes ago myself in r/MLS. The baseball thing is the best part. Don't get me wrong, I like baseball. But you cannot be a fan of a sport that is so famously considered the height of dullness and then make fun of other sports for being boring.

Do we still have anyone else paying attention to MLS besides me? I haven't been talking about it here because I don't recall that it got much attention last year, but I'd be happy to post about it if people are watching.

A quick roundup of news from opening weekend in MLS:

Chivas USA, aka Get The Fuck Out Gringos FC CD, reported attendance in the 7000s. Grant Wahl says this is crap and attendance was in the 4000s, of which some 2100 tickets were comped. Put a bullet in this shithole team that doesn't give a fuck about the league or the country it plays in. Then put a bullet in the owner. Then fill the void in the league by bringing the Minnesota Stars or whatever the Orlando team is called (Strikers?) into MLS instead of Miami, who don't care and already failed to support a team, and instead of this ridiculous attempt at a second NY team. I don't care how bad the weather was, if my team's away support ever, ever outnumbers (and out-shouts) your home attendance, your city does not need a second team yet.

'Caps captain Jay DeMerit is out with a serious injury to his Achilles tendon. He is expected to miss the entire 2013 season. This injury occurred in the opening six (6) minutes of the game.

The Philadelphia Union looked like they might be dangerous for a bit thanks to Bizarro Kenny Cooper Sebastien Le Toux's return. Luckily, they remembered that they are the Philadelphia Union and promptly screwed the pooch to lose to Sporting KC. Everyone hates Philly. My lone disappointment with that match is that no Union players spontaneously combusted.

My own DC United have started the season out with a whimper, losing 0-2 to Houston, in Houston. This continues our proud history of never winning in Houston. (I mean ever -- our franchise record in Houston is something like 0-10-3 now.) Small consolation: many other teams have also never won in Houston. Also, our star player, DP, and league MVP Dwayne DeRosario was suspended for this match, as well as our home opener this weekend against Real Salt Lake, for headbutting former DC United player Danny Cruz in a preseason match against Philadelphia. No one seems to be 100% sure what happened, as this was the one preseason match that wasn't videotaped. Our manager, Ben Olsen, has said he's fine with it.

DC have also signed Carlos Ruiz, about whom I know nothing but who is apparently possibly the biggest, dive-iest asshole in the league. This is likely to embarrass us greatly. Perhaps we can take solace in his likely masterful trolling of everybody else, as San Jose does with Steven Lenhart.

Speaking of Steven Lenhart, the 'Quakes lost last night. This is proof that god is real and he loves us.

Portland Timbers might not be garbage this year -- too early to tell, and early defense was laughable last night and gave up three goals. But in the second half they drew level and kept out any more goals. Believe: When you sack Kris Boyd, anything is possible. Boyd is now back playing for Kilmarnock, and you should refer to them henceforth as "the team who take players who weren't good enough for the 2012 Portland squad."

New England had a bye this week. This has spared us additional precipitation in what is expected to be an eventful weather week in the Northeast, as there are no shed Massachussetts tears to be reabsorbed into the atmosphere.

Perhaps this will be the year I finally seek out MLS on television. Summer is otherwise pretty much bereft of sports (especially since I no longer consider baseball a sport).