Broken Football League (2012-13 Fantasy Football)

He does the drafting, I do the free agent work. It's an unstoppable combo!

Actually, I owe you thanks for unknowingly helping me out this year. I copied your Alfred Morris pickup in my money league and that's a big reason why I made the playoffs there as well. You were on that way early. Nice one.

Thanks! I nabbed him in three leagues after hearing word before the season that he was their unquestioned starter. I'm definitely happy about how that's worked out!

Week 14 Awards!

The You'd Think We Traded For Steve Nash Or Something Award goes to the Kansas City Hotsteppers, who faded fast down the stretch, dropping three of their last four to thbpppppt straight out of the playoffs. Hiring D'Antoni next year.

The HAX Award goes to Steve Smith and Tony Gonzalez, a combined 189 years old and continually winning games for the Ohio Players this year.

The Somebody Didn't Get The Memo Award goes to Torrey Smith of Jim Sorgi Saved Me, the only member of that team who scored less than 9 points. Just imagine if Brandon Lloyd and his 20 points weren't on the bench!

The I Find Your Lack of Faith... Entirely Correct, As It Turns Out goes to Texans D/ST, whose -4 would have almost lost this game for the Red Army... had he not purposely benched them right before the game against New England.

The B-Grade Aliens Versus Predator Award goes to Mike Wallace (23) vs. Knowshon Moreno (21). No matter who wins in this sudden spurt of fantasy relevance between two massive disappointments... we lose.

The Bring Me The Head Of David Wilson Award goes to David Wilson of the Antonio Gates Fail Team! I drafted you. I started you. And you failed me, and I cut you, and then you get signed and score TWENTY-EIGHT POINTS all of a sudden? Fortunately, the Cardinals defense fell off a cliff and onto a sack of grenades.

The FINISH HIM Award goes to Seahawks D/ST for the Olympia Waterboys. 41 points. One of the biggest fantasy days in the history of fantasy football. Sorry, Richard.

The Curse Of Meghan Bowyer Award goes to The Watergaters and the Burlington Blitzers. No one who employs Ben Roethlisberger or Philip Rivers can succeed!

Week 14 Bonus Award!


The Battle Dancer Award goes to Cam Newton!

That's my guy! I have him on all 3 of my teams this year and he's currently #3 among all QBs (just 10 points behind Brady). Not too shabby.

Matt Bowyer, get Dwayne Bowe out of your lineup, pronto!

Thank you!

I mean, sure, I wouldn't mind an advantage, but let's play fair here!

Matt! You're starting Beanie Wells! Warning!

Thanks a lot, me! Stevie's into double digit scoring already!

AND I AM RICHER FOR IT.

Let's see. How's he doing? Ah, it's good Beanie this week!

My biggest mistake was not starting Russell Wilson. Heavens.

What happened to Demaryius Thomas?

And why did I put Ryan Mathews in at the last minute?

Help me, Tom Brady, you're my only hope!

Well, the Hydra didn't need Jim Sorgi this week as my team went face down into the dirt. Congrats to them as they move on.

Beanie, you are really twisting the knife. Why didn't you ever score 24 points for me?

He had Ed Reed-itis

Alright in a week where it doesn't matter for me, my team comes through with the highest scoring total thus far. Where was this team all year!?

Week 15 Awards!

The Eff You Thursday Night Football Award goes to me! I'm not technically late on the awards anymore! Also Thursday night football is terrible.

The Saturday Night Fever Award goes to Alfred Morris, BenJarvus Green-Ellis, and DeMarco Murray, who combined for enough points on their own in their 1970's style ground-and-pound style to secure a playoff victory for Jim Sorgi Saved Me.

The Not A Misprint Award goes to a playoff game featuring three players from the Raiders! Only Brandon Myers started, and only Brandon Myers scored -- 1 whole point.

The Finnegan's Wake Award goes to the Rams D/ST. More like the Is Cortland Finnegan Awake Award hoooooooooooooo

The That Citizen Eco-Drive Commercial Should Be Pulled For False Advertising Award goes to Eli Manning of the Olympia Waterboys, who fortunately was benched before the game began, so his 2 points didn't bring about problems for the Waterboys.

The Best-Laid Plans Award goes to A GLORIOUS PENIS JOKE, who made a bunch of really smart sit/start decisions that didn't pay off. Josh Gordon against the sieve-like Redskins defense? 2 points. Bilal Powell against the hapless Titans run defense? 3 points. Matthew Stafford vs. the Cardinals instead of Christian Ponder vs. the Rams? Debatable, but Ponder was coming off a 1 point game against Chicago, and had 12 points over the last two weeks. All moves I would have made.

The Shonn Greene Scholarship Award goes to Dennis Pitta, who nearly doubled his previous high week in a fantasy playoff performance that will certainly lead to him being listed as RISING in every annual next year. Just like Mr. Greene before him.

The I Deserved That Award goes to the Burlington Blitzers, who notified me that I still had Dwayne Bowe in my lineup, watched his replacement Stevie Johnson score 17, and lost by 11.

The You Should Rename Your Team "Calvin And The Chipmunks" goes to The Peatheads, for no reason at all.

The Late Bloomer Award goes to the Antonio Gates Fail Team, who had three players set season-highs in scoring, and paced all of us in points... down at 3-11 in the Losers Bracket.

The FINE WE'RE MOVING TO FRACTIONAL SCORING ALREADY Award goes to another goddamn tie.

Week 15 Bonus Award!



The DOINK Award goes to Devon Wylie!

Ouch, I gotta wash the salt out of the wound on that one! :)

Great job on the awards as usual!

Damn it. Somehow Larry Fitzgerald wound up in my flex spot, rather than Kenny Britt. Argh!

oh my.... Aaron Rogers is going to single-handedly destroy my playoff run, isn't he

With Lynch and the Seahawks D up against Vernon Davis, I'm feeling pretty good about your chances—and thus pretty bad about mine. And I have Lynch in my other league, where I am getting handled, so feeling very conflicted about this.

That's funny because I have Adrian Peterson and Vernon Davis in my other league.

I don't think it's quite fair that your defense tried to murder my tight end.

ha... his QB tried to murder him. That was a picture-perfect DB play with a totally bogus pansy-ass penalty :)

And yet it turned out to be a wash. Who'd've thunk it?

Congrats to Olympia Waterboys and Ohio Players for making it to the championship game. Good luck to both of you!

Week 17 is a tough time to set a lineup -- I'm hoping my decision to pick up and play Jackie Battle instead of either of my Falcons running backs pays off....

Awards will happen... later. I'm on vacation.

The Seattle game isn't on here so I'm on edge waiting for the waterboys scoring to take off. It's so hard to judge who's going to show up and play on week 17.

Unless Dan Bailey goes on a tear, congrats on winning the league!