Taking @Kalle's de Broken mod, I'm starting a game. Step 1: Get Lum The Mad married. Now, since I need to gain more land, I want to marry a countess. Since Angie is married to Matt (and I have a low chance of killing him), I've decided to marry him off to the Countess of Lesbos. Yum, Lum is marrying a Lesbian. Then, because he's mad, MAD I say....
The reason I held off on marrying the lesbian is because the fertility penalty. I mean, homosexual nobles will still do their duty in the bedchamber and procreate, usually, but they're not keen on the business which is why they're less likely to have kids. However, in combination with the fertility penalty Lum gets from being mad there was a very real chance that the game would end in 50 years after Lum produced no heirs at all.
After the death of Baron Elyscape, Lum The Mad had his children Soli-Chan and Krayz murdered so that he could take the castle. He then took all the money that Elyscape had ferreted away and bought himself a Dukeship.
Well, they managed to eke out another kid, but playing as a Madman is very hard, because everyone hates you. Plus, sitting next to the very rich section of Constantinople is doesn't bode well, I think I'm about to get murdered by the Thrace. Angie Von Hatoful, on the other hand, is doing quite well.
Madman is probably the worst trait in the game, in fierce competition with Plague and Leprosy. But I couldn't put Lum in a game and not make him Mad. It wouldn't be right.
I was having no luck as Lum, and then someone assassinated him, so I was playing the young Balls De Broken, totally poor, having no fun. So I switched over to Angie! Man, this is more like it! View attachment 16141 Duchess Angie is a badass in all respects. Her stats are ridiculously good. She is also lustful, and has had 8 children. Child 1 (now dead) via an affair with Quatoria (still going on) Children 2, 3, and 4 via Matt, who died in a suspicious accident. Child 5 by husband #2, who died in a suspicious accident. Child 6 by husband #3, who died in a suspicious accident. Children 7 and 8 by Quatoria again. His wife loved that. I threw her in jail, then offed my husband to get another one, in the hope of getting more money. I need money! Edit: In an effort to get my children via Quatoria on the county seat I gave him, I assassinated his remaining non-bastard child. However, I was found out, and quatoria got pissed at me and broke off our relationship. So he tried to assassinate someone else, I tried to throw him in jail, he revolted, he lost, I banished him and his wife, took the money, bought myself another Duchess-dom. Of course, I was maimed in the battle against Quatoria, and now... Karma!
Yeah, but you and your wife (who hates you for that whole, you know, cheating thing) are now the entire council for a one-province count in the middle of Russia, while Duchess Angie is on her way to becoming Queen of Bulgaria. The best part is that you took the kids with you when you left. That's ok, Angie has more.
Nope, they have no claims. And one of the things that CK2+ lets you do is call your children home. So now Robert Quatoriashvili and Quatoria Ircer are in my court! I think I'll educate them myself...
Hrm, I'm probably not the right person to ask here... This will go well! Angie is 56, maimed, and afflicted with Gonorrhea. She is going to make a move on her 20 year old son. Ewww. EWWWWWWWWWWW
@_@ I don't know whether to laugh or cry. Is this even possible in the unmodded game, or was it enabled by the mod?
Angie died. Her daugher, Aurora "the Chaste" is now in charge. Quite a change here. And oh-ho, look who's come slinking back. The years have not been kind. Still a martial master, but far past his prime. Still married to his wife Hripsimeh (who hates him). It's been pretty quiet, mainly using all the money to funnel back into money-generating buildings. I'll need 500 gold to buy myself the crown of Bulgaria.
So after Angie died, Aurora "The Chaste" took over, and got enough money to make herself Queen of Bulgaria. (PS: Kalle, you should change the name of Bulgaria to Brokenia). She mainly did lots of investing, with an occasional province grab every now and then. She also married off all of the various Angie-Spawn all over the map, placing Von Hatofuls in key positions all over the globe. She married some Count somewhere, and had a few kids. Unfortunately, her husband died, so Edith, the heir, left the court early to go run that county out of my realm. This always worries me, because it leads to problems. In this case, the problem is that she married her Uncle. Daddy Issues, anyone? Then Aurora died, she came home to be the Queen, and all was well, except that she decided to take a lover... Her husband's (uncle's) son (her cousin), and then they proceeded to have inbred children. <facepalm> Not quite as bad as this guy though: However, regardless of the mess of her personal life, she managed to grab Constantinople and move the capital to there. That's a very, very rich province, so money is OK! Did find the best Bishop ever, though!
Well, since the world ends tomorrow (the new CK2 patch and expansion will break CK2+) here's where we're at. Grabbed enough counties to form the Byzantine Empire! Somewhere in the process I saw a weak claim for one of the Von Hatoful on the Kingdom of Burgundy, so I invaded and added them to the empire. I also managed to do the "Repair the Great Schism" special event, which reunites the Catholic and Orthodox churches. Thiw was tricky, as it requires 2000 piety (and the 5 pentarch holdings) to do. I'd like to thank the Golden Horde and Ilkhanate for constantly declaring war, allowing for massive hundreds of piety-granting battles of a hundred thousand troops. The hilarious thing about fixing the Schism is that it turns Catholiscm into a Heresy of Orthodoxy! It looks like some of the various nobles randomly flip over, and then EVERY DECLARE HOLY WAR ON EACH OTHER. Hilarity. These guys finally showed up and didn't get instantly stomped. Poor Welsh. And I found this guy in my Kingdom after I vassalized another county. HI FLINT.
And I think this will do it... The Roman Empire restored. Empress Marged von Hatoful the Glorious Saint.
And who got me there.... I will confess to using the console to change the culture of the ruler to Broken once (Athanasios), from Greek.
The CK2+ guy is getting a job at Paradox starting February so I'm not sure how much time he has to work the mod but he'll probably put out a 1.09 compatible version fairly quickly. After that, who knows. As for the Broken minimod don't expect any updates to 1.09 until I finish my LP. :)
