A new version of Dwarf Fortress has arrived, with a variety of new ways to torture us endlessly. I'm going to attempt to settle a hopeless team of dwarves in a haunted wilderness, because there's nothing like rains of toxic fluid and clouds of zombie gas to make life more interesting. I'm using Ironhand's Graphics Set for this, since I think it makes the screenshots a little more intelligible for non-players, and also I am a big baby. So, first I create a small world. This takes a long time since I set it to proceed to the year 2012 for fun, but I can already see some promise. There's at least one vast haunted hilly region... with cities in it, no less. I might check that out later in Adventurer mode. It turns out this is pretty much the only haunted area on the map, other than a really scary glacier a bit north, so I guess this is where we're headed. I find a nice place with no aquifer, some metals, and a brook called Scribeskirts. To the Obscene Hills we go! The dwarves, in a sudden fit of dullness, name the place Glazedcoast. Guys, the coast is about a hundred miles north, and as for glaze, I don't know what - - well I suppose that counts. I have no idea what this does, but we're getting out of it asap. Everything around us is featureless snow, dead trees, and puddles of ooze, so we just dig straight down: The darker patches are, yes, wonderful skyslime. There's a brook under all this somewhere. The rain of unspeakable horror from the sky is making the dwarves feverish and nauseated so I usher them all quickly into the tiny hole in the clay the miners have managed to dig. They quickly coat it in a fine layer of vomit. Still, nobody's been eaten by zombie badgers yet so actually this is looking pretty good. The fever and the nausea pass fairly quickly once they're out of the rain, so at least there's no permanent effects from that. This is good, 'cause they left the cart and everything outside, and someone is going to have to go brave the eternal snotblizzard to bring all the supplies in. Luckily, it is really easy to dig through clay, so carving out a temporary storeroom is only a few minutes' work. I lay down some stockpiles and the dwarves get to work piling up their worldly goods in the damp hole in the ground we will be calling home. I even get brave and order the woodcutter to take down some of the trees. Meanwhile, aboveground, spring is arriving and the snow has melted to reveal the local plants - something called "wormy tendrils". They squirm. A lot. Also staring eyeballs. Occasionally they blink. The ones nearest the fort entrance are covered in vomit and malodorous ooze. Glazedcoast: Come for the graspy tentacleflora, stay for the torrent of viscous fluids. I suppose it's about time to introduce our varied cast of characters. In-game status screen behind the spoilers for folks who like to see that. Zulban Narrowflag, our glorious leader and woodcutter/carpenter with a disturbing attraction to chickens! Sakzul Violentchanneled, a miner. He likes horses. I predict a zombie-horse incident in his future. Shorast Blockadeclenches, also a miner. Also, from his description, possibly a bear trying to pass as a dwarf. Onul Haildoor, the mason. Unfortunately his name has a lot of unusual characters which this tileset likes to render as symbols. Think of him as Missingno, the dwarf. Ral Girdergorged, the planter and the only woman for some reason. Kol Cradledbridges, the trader, organizer, and general paperwork man. If we survive long enough to actually make anything in this god-forsaken vomit-filled pit, he'll tell us how much it's worth. Adil Roompatterned, our hardened axe-wielding warrior, who I brought because I really expected the place to be swarming with monsters. Mostly his job is to move heavy objects in the slimerain. I ran out of image space so I'll throw his description in the next post. But there you have it - seven dwarves, against slime, evil plants, and whatever other horrors await them in the Obscene Hills. This is my first attempt at a Let's Play so if anyone had any advice I am eager to hear it. Right now I'm playing alone but if anyone wants to take a year and turn this into a succession fortress, I am happy to do that. Also if someone wants a dwarf named after themselves, please speak up.