I am dragging you all down with me - Let's Play kuso-ge

*reads whole thread*

...what the HELL.

I feel like the LP forum should have a warning about losing your sanity to anyone who stumbles upon it.

I'm not sorry.

I FINALLY CAUGHT UP

Also, in response to the choices,

HELL YES I SHOWED UP TO SOMETHING IN TIME TO VOTE \o/

Er, I mean, don't do it. (Although I am curious if every single choice in this game railroads you.)

Trying to control Bela Lugosi is futile; he's a strong, independent vampire that don't need no player guidance.

I actually played this a while back but then I didn't post it because I was doing stuff...good thing the vote didn't change >.>

You people and your self-restraint~

We’re really hungry now, though…

(You can actually bite her, I checked. First non-railroaded choice?!)

We fly around to another room with another open window. Do these people never learn?




Because the best way to impress your date is to surprise her by waking her up!



Helen is not surprised, though…
She asks us to give her twenty minutes to get ready.



Bela.

She pushes us out the door and we go wait with our snazzy Rolls Royce.



Do I detect a hint of photoshop?

There’s some flirting (“I only take this car out for special occasions”) and some swanky music at the Rainbow Club, and then BAM WE SKIP TO SEVERAL HOURS LATER, AFTER THE DATE.



What, no dancing animations? C’mon, even Kawaii Chistmas gave me that much.

Anyway it was a lovely evening blah blah whatever but we’re getting thirsty.

We go back to the Chance Estate to drop off Helen.



There’s some more flirting, and then Helen invites us in.



Of course, thanks to our hypnotism, she gets very sleepy. Looks like it’ll be feeding time soon!



Ohohoho~

Do we get to drink her blood now?

(I dunno, I missed most of this let's play and really don't know what's going on and I can't be bothered to catch up so I just want BLOOD.)

EDIT: Dangit, and then you posted as I was writing and this post makes much less sense now.

We wait till she’s fast asleep, then sneak in through her window again and…





Ugh, slurping noises.



Bela, wipe your mouth! You are a grown man. Stop making a mess.



Gross.

Hooray? This is good, right? I'm not sure anymore...

Yaaaaaaay!

(Help what am I becoming)

One of us! One of us!

And then it’s on to the next chapter. The last one~



We got sunburned a bit, but it’s okay. The things we do for a meal…

We also have a nice little chat with our uncles. And by ‘nice’ I mean ‘extremely boring and irrelevant to the story’.
Yeeeeaah, I’m kind of ready for the conclusion to this story.

It’s time for bed. We had a long night.



The last time Bela had a bed, he was staked through the chest, so let’s not do that again.

When we wake up several hours later, we visit the doctor because there appears to be a problem with Bela’s eyes. It turns out that Bela’s retinas have been burned severely and we simple have to wait until they recover.



That right there seems to be Dwight’s brain. Yeah, they just kind of threw that in there.

Alas, when we go to sleep and recover, visitors arrive!




Okay, now I’m interested again.

A powerful vampire and a sorceress have come to visit! This is somewhat problematic given that we can’t see, but hopefully they’re friendly.



Wat

GUYS THIS IS HELEN’S GREAT-GRANDFATHER

SHIT

Bela's fucked.

It’s, uh, i-it’s-

We don't know each other well enough to make such a decision yet. Seems like the most diplomatic response... maybe.

What EvilFuzzy9 said.

Like we're not gonna be railroaded into lawful shotgun wedlock anyway. But sure let's try to squirm out we hardly know this lady.

I played a lot, I'm gonna try and finish the game tonight!

We don’t know her that well, okay? It was just one date!



Well I for one am not considering marriage. Helen just wants us for our…everything that’s not personality!



She has a thing for vampires, sooooooo yes probably.
Jonathan asks if we intend to make her into a vampire.



I know I keep saying it but Twilight.

Jonathan accurately guesses that we are both a vampire and a sorcerer, but it doesn’t really matter. They both approve of us, but say that if we are not planning to marry her then we should keep the whole vampire thing on the down-low.

We also kind of persuade him into getting revenge on Edward for us. Hehehe~



Finally, Bela and I are perfectly in sync.

Then we get a phone call!



HOW DO I DATING?




Yes, we very manfully resisted sucking her blood while she was asleep and defenseless.

Anyway we can’t go because of the whole retina thing, but Helen has something else to say. She wants to tell us about one of her….hobbies. She collects…things.



Very specific memorabilia. That she wants us to see. Greeeaaaaat.

We agree to meet two days later, at 8PM.



Gurl, stop trying to show us off.

Two days later, we are not completely healed, buuuuut…



Reading glasses will solve this problem!

Blah blah blah he explains the mechanics of Bela’s hypnotism. Basically, Bela has less cones and more rods in his eyes than normal humans, and he also has some weird luminescent light sphere thingies that allow him to hypnotize. The less cones/more rods thing, for those of you who haven’t brushed up on your biology, means he doesn’t see colours as well but has excellent night vision.

The whole ‘no hypnotism’ thing means we can’t feed, but luckily the doctor’s got our back.



That cannot be healthy.

The doctor gets a bit creepy so we just leave ASAP.

We go off to meet Helen and her friend.



Francis wants a piece of this, but we are being gentlemanly and stuff. Particularly because Helen is the jealous sort.



Yeah, Francis wants us badly.

After some small talk, Helen is reminded about showing us her hobby and Francis tactfully retreats.

Bela points out that Francis shouldn’t smoke in the car, using his keep observations skills to deduce that she’s a smoker.



Oh. Well, bye!

So, Helen, what’s your hobby?



We have a confession too!



Awwwwwwww




And so on.

Then Bela proposes to her, and info-dumps basically everything about him.

She asks what would happen if she rejected us. We would have to erase our existence from her memory. How very clichéd.

Helen is willing to give it a try, so she will meet the family the following day. Oh, joy of joys!

Thankfully, there is a convenient (if somewhat abrupt) timeskip.



They had a honeymoon cruise to New York, spent several weeks in a coastal manor…



That happened too…

AND THEN THEY HAD SEXYTIEMS not pictured, thankfully AND THE END!!!!!


I actually played through and picked several other options to see what happens. You can decline going to the party, which leads to a quick game over. That last choice was also quite important – you can also get at least one more ending. Somehow we managed to make our way through and get the best ending on the first try! Pretty impressive, Broken Forumers.

Hooray we got the best doing possible.

OH MY GOD WE MANAGED TO GET THE BEST ENDING FIRST TIME AROUND.

DOES THAT MEAN WE'RE IMPROVING?

Well that was quite sudden for a game this drawn out.

There's a reason it's part of this thread.

Goodbye, Bela. I'm going to miss your wonderful B movie presence.

After the tedious goes-on-forever game that we just played, I picked one that I thought was funnier to balance it out! And don’t worry, none of the other games are that long.





EDIT: Found the title, I wasn't quick enough to capture it the first time.

This game is highly interactive (compared to the others), so I’ll be choosing everything. It’s not long, and I’ll be playing all the options anyway.

I can choose to go through the door, open a drawer in my desk, or turn the computer on. I like internetz, so what the heck, I turn on the computer.


(Nice animations, looks like you almost put some effort into this game! This is definitely out of the running for 'worst game' because of that.)



Let’s surf the internet!



It asks me again what I want to do and returns me to the previous choice, so let’s play games.



Well that…sucks.

YOU LOSE

Oh, it was a trap.

Yeah, there is no way to escape the internet once you decide to go on it. Which, I suppose, is a little accurate.

I found the title menu! You can…only reach it…after completing a path.

I guess the goal of the game is to escape boredom. Let’s go outside this time.



Not actually outside though, let’s go through the side door.



wat



Um-

YOU LOSE

O…kay…

Deep.

Let’s try again.

Let’s go outside. Really outside.



YOU LOSE

Aw…