In which I post the terrible "your mom" jokes that incessantly pop into my head as I read the forums

Discussion in 'Drama Llama Holding Pen' started by Griot, Dec 17, 2012.

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  1. Griot Despondent Fancybear

    Location:
    Raleigh, NC
    If your posts appear here, it has absolutely nothing to do with you as a person nor my feelings towards you, so please do not take it personally. This is just something that my brain does. Now, rather than fight off the urge to make these posts in the host threads, I'll just make them here. I apologize in advance.

    Edit: These will rarely, if ever, resemble the traditional "yo momma" jokes. They're not even jokes, really.
    Griot, Dec 17, 2012
    #1 Last edited by Griot, Dec 17, 2012
    ehm ecks, RyanMM, Sjofn and 2 others like this.

  2. Griot Despondent Fancybear

    Location:
    Raleigh, NC
    Can we please just admit that maybe your mom is a good idea finally?
    Griot, Dec 17, 2012
    #2
    ehm ecks, Lizzy W, Bryce and 2 others like this.

  3. Bahimiron Already Beat BF's New Expansion

    YOUR MOTHER IS AN OBESE WHORE!

    That little bon mot pops into my head whenever anyone disagrees with me on any subject ever. I've never shared it, though, cos I'm waitin' for the day when I can drop it and totally wreck someone forever and everyone will cheer for me and call me savior and forum ladies will want to PM me pics of their feet.
    Bahimiron, Dec 17, 2012
    #3
    Fii, Failure Hero, Shake and 3 others like this.

  4. madkevin Despondent Fancybear

    So, it's like random thoughts and questions... ABOUT YOUR MOM?
    madkevin, Dec 17, 2012
    #4
    Fii, Lizzy, Elyscape and 1 other person like this.

  5. Griot Despondent Fancybear

    Location:
    Raleigh, NC
    I want to change the thread title now.
    Griot, Dec 17, 2012
    #5
    Elyscape likes this.

  6. Jamie Madigan Armchair Designer

    Jamie Madigan, Dec 17, 2012
    #6
    Kie, Fii, MariPanda and 11 others like this.

  7. Griot Despondent Fancybear

    Location:
    Raleigh, NC
    Alternate alternate thread title:

    I think we need a YOUR MOM thread
    Griot, Dec 17, 2012
    #7
    Elyscape likes this.

  8. Griot Despondent Fancybear

    Location:
    Raleigh, NC
    YOUR MOM swears by them!
    Griot, Dec 17, 2012
    #8
    Elyscape likes this.

  9. Kildorn Beardy Magnificence

    Location:
    Boston, MA
    We just need a "YOUR MOM" button, in which we imply we wanted to make a Your Mom joke to that post.
    Kildorn, Dec 17, 2012
    #9
    Kie, Fii, MariPanda and 7 others like this.

  10. madkevin Despondent Fancybear

    Hey, Griot? Has anything of interest happened to YOUR MOM recently?
    madkevin, Dec 17, 2012
    #10
    Elyscape, Bryce and Griot like this.

  11. Bryce Keeper of the Elemental Materials

    Star Trek into Your Mom.
    Bryce, Dec 17, 2012
    #11
    Elyscape likes this.

  12. daemion Beardy Magnificence

    Location:
    Dr. Fred's Laboratory
    daemion, Dec 17, 2012
    #12
    nlanza, ehm ecks, Bryce and 2 others like this.

  13. Afti Cuts Down The River, Not Across The Road

    I believe that the uncivilized types that congregate in this thread of discussion may be intimating cruel mistruths about your mother! You won't stand for that, will you?
    Afti, Dec 17, 2012
    #13

  14. Elyscape Already Beat BF's New Expansion

    Location:
    San Jose, CA
    Your mom won't stand for that.
    Elyscape, Dec 17, 2012
    #14
    Fii, MariPanda, Bryce and 1 other person like this.

  15. Afti Cuts Down The River, Not Across The Road

    Your mother cannot stand for that; she is unable, as the force of my considerable penis thrusting in and out of her vagina has crushed her pelvis. I'm sorry to say she may never walk again.
    Afti, Dec 17, 2012
    #15
    Fii, ehm ecks, Sjofn and 3 others like this.

  16. Bryce Keeper of the Elemental Materials

    The Really Fucking Stupid Things You See Your Mom Post Thread

    That could be a real thing.
    Bryce, Dec 17, 2012
    #16
    Kie, Eightball, MariPanda and 6 others like this.

  17. Afti Cuts Down The River, Not Across The Road

    Yeah, I'm not exactly good at your mom jokes.

    But, man, that's low-hanging fruit! Now I'm going to get all funky and depressive.
    Afti, Dec 17, 2012
    #17

  18. Griot Despondent Fancybear

    Location:
    Raleigh, NC
    Your mom's not exactly good at your mom jokes.
    Griot, Dec 17, 2012
    #18 Last edited by Griot, Dec 17, 2012
    Sjofn, Bryce and Elyscape like this.

  19. Failure Hero Already Beat BF's New Expansion

    Location:
    Vegas
    Your Mother Being Racist On Twitter
    Failure Hero, Dec 17, 2012
    #19
    Athryn, daemion, Bryce and 1 other person like this.

  20. shift6 Magister Mundi Elyscape

    shift6, Dec 18, 2012
    #20
    MariPanda, Elyscape and Failure Hero like this.

  21. XPav Elitist Negative Nancy

    Location:
    Grogaboo hunting
    XPav, Dec 18, 2012
    #21
    Griot and Elyscape like this.

  22. FerdieLance Beardy Magnificence

    Location:
    San Francisco, California
    Quick, someone start a thread about Dr. Strangelove, or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb.
    FerdieLance, Dec 18, 2012
    #22
    RyanMM, Elyscape, Bryce and 1 other person like this.

  23. Griot Despondent Fancybear

    Location:
    Raleigh, NC
    More like "Dr. Strangelove, or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Your Mom: A Father's Tale."
    Griot, Dec 18, 2012
    #23
    RyanMM, Raife, Elyscape and 1 other person like this.

  24. Nute Already Beat BF's New Expansion

    Location:
    KC MO
    Nute, Dec 18, 2012
    #24
    Kie, MariPanda, Hunty and 5 others like this.

  25. Sjofn Magister Mundi Elyscape

    Location:
    California
    This thread is goofy, and I wish to hug it.
    Sjofn, Dec 18, 2012
    #25
    RyanMM likes this.

  26. Hanacker Armchair Designer

    Yo mama so fat, when she wears a red dress kids ask her for Kool Aid!

    Oh yeah!
    Hanacker, Dec 18, 2012
    #26

  27. Elyscape Already Beat BF's New Expansion

    Location:
    San Jose, CA
    Your mom is goofy, and I wish to hug it.

    Uh.
    Elyscape, Dec 18, 2012
    #27
    MariPanda, Teddybear of Death, Jacquelle and 1 other person like this.

  28. Sjofn Magister Mundi Elyscape

    Location:
    California
    My mom loves hugs, I'll have you know.
    Sjofn, Dec 18, 2012
    #28
    Bladida, Jacquelle and Elyscape like this.

  29. SwitchKnitter Already Beat BF's New Expansion

    Location:
    Central Florida
    Cool story bro: My sister's in grad school to become a middle-school teacher. She was doing a practice stint at a school a couple of months ago, and she asked the class who signed the Declaration of Independence. One of the kids said "Your momma." Next day she reported back to the class (truthfully!) that our mother had been quite flattered to be thought such an important part of history. All the kids were in awe. "You TOLD YOUR MOTHER?!?!"

    My sister's awesome.
    SwitchKnitter, Dec 19, 2012
    #29
    Western Scrub Jay, Kie, Antiqua and 13 others like this.

  30. Bahimiron Already Beat BF's New Expansion

    When I lived in Omaha my roommate and I communicated mostly in mom 'jokes'. Jokes in quotes cos they weren't particularly funny. Just a whole lot of 'man, the Statue of Rallos Zek really fucked us up last night' 'not as sweetly as I fucked your mom last night!' I am not proud, but it is a thing that happened.

    Anyway, I made a friend at work and at one point I let a mom joke slip out. He laughed and I laughed and all was okay with the world. I didn't make a habit of it, but if something irresistable presented itself, I'd make a joke. "He's looking for a motor with a shaft in each end." "Like your mom?"

    Then a month or so later I went over to his place to go fishing and his mom was there. He introduced me to her, "Mom, this is Adam. But you know him, since you guys have sex all the time."

    Yeah. He showed me. I've probably never been so red.
    Bahimiron, Dec 19, 2012
    #30
    Western Scrub Jay, Kie, Fii and 38 others like this.

  31. Griot Despondent Fancybear

    Location:
    Raleigh, NC
    An old roommate of mine was a master of the intentionally awkward mom joke. Stuff like, "You mom's so fat that she walked into the grocery store and exclaimed, 'Where's all the food???"
    ...
    ...
    Because, you see, what had happened was the she had fallen through the floor and was actually in the basement where they didn't store any food."
    Griot, Dec 19, 2012
    #31
    Kie, Fii, Eightball and 5 others like this.

  32. eotinb Oh, Come On

    But your mom has. Been that red. Because of sex, probably.
    eotinb, Dec 19, 2012
    #32
    Lizard_King and RyanMM like this.

  33. Stupid Newbie Hivemind Coordinator

    Location:
    Potato Land
    Brad Wardell/Stardock sues Your Mom for one million dollars.

    Because your mom's nipples look better on T.V.
    Stupid Newbie, Dec 19, 2012
    #33
    lesslucid, Griot, XPav and 2 others like this.

  34. Nute Already Beat BF's New Expansion

    Location:
    KC MO
    [IMG]
    Nute, Dec 19, 2012
    #34
    Kie, Fii, Antiqua and 18 others like this.

  35. Hanacker Armchair Designer

    Yo mama so hairy, it looks likes she's got Buckwheat in a headlock.
    Hanacker, Dec 19, 2012
    #35
    Lizard_King likes this.

  36. Sjofn Magister Mundi Elyscape

    Location:
    California
    Please forward my like to your friend.
    Sjofn, Dec 19, 2012
    #36
    Kie, Eightball, Randissimo and 5 others like this.

  37. kerzain Beardy Magnificence

    Location:
    Job 3:26
    You're a real motherfucker, you know that?
    kerzain, Dec 19, 2012
    #37
    Speak With Bread, Lizard_King, Quackers and 2 others like this.

  38. nlanza Keeper of the Elemental Materials

    Location:
    Pittsburgh
    nlanza, Dec 19, 2012
    #38
    Kie, Fii, Tankero and 8 others like this.

  39. RyanMM Magister Mundi Elyscape

    Location:
    Ferndale, MI
    RyanMM, Dec 19, 2012
    #39

  40. Griot Despondent Fancybear

    Location:
    Raleigh, NC
    Your Mom Modification Wishlist
    Griot, Dec 19, 2012
    #40
    RyanMM and Elyscape like this.
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