One Does Not Simply Walk into Mordor - Let's Play Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King for GBA

Whoa, wait, what? I'm not paying a dime for hosting any of my images. But I feel like photobucket works a bit better for me. Maybe try that? I dunno, I wouldn't pay for hosting if I don't have to /cheapskate

On another note, I really like her expression in the picture.

Ah. Never mind. I guess imgur was just being a dick.

Anyways, it seems the general consensus was to equip the sharpened longsword...







...so that's what we do.

Also, I sell the blacksmith and ally's longswords for some extra scratch.

With that out of the way, Eowyn heads back the way she came.



: Man, I could really use some kingsfoil right about now...



: I mean, I'm pretty sure it isn't healthy to be losing this much blood.



: Haha, it sure would suck if I ran into a bunch of enemies right about -- oooh, squirrel! So tiny and cute and fluffy! It's so adorable and--

:A-HEM.

: --eh?



:...oh.

: OH.



: FUCK.

: Am... am I... dead...? Everything's black... I can't see... I can't anything. Is this what death is like? No golden fields...? No fiery pits...? Just... nothing?
...
...WHAT A GYP.



: Wait... I think I see something... I can just barely make it out, but... it almost... looks like...



:... A-Aragorn...!





: eeeeeeeeee

Wait... was that... was that supposed to happen? That whole dying thing... Or does Aragorn show up whenever Eowyn's on the brink of death?

She died and got sent back to the start of the level (losing a bit of gems and exp in the process). And I didn't intend for her to die, but with her health that low I couldn't really help it.

OHHH. Okay, that makes more sense. I thought this was a plot point. Whoops, sorry! And, yeah, kinda unavoidable.

WELP. I haven't felt like been able to update this recently. So here's a peace offering drawn in windows paint by yours truly:

Hope you guys liek it~

ooh mister aragorn /swoon

I probably could have -- and probably should have -- updated this sooner. But I was feeling lazy.

STILL. Here it is.

The next update.

also I'm experimenting with smaller images because my computer has been really tsundere about loading the pages on this thread



Resuming from where we left off, Eowyn had just died only to reappear back at the start of the level, going all wibbly and blushy at the sight of Aragorn.

: What's going on...? Didn't I die? Why is Aragorn here?

: Be wary! The lingering forces of Saruman still befoul these lands with their presence.



: Huh? Why does this sound familiar...?

Automatically replying while her mind was busily puzzling over her situation, Eowyn absently said,

: Then we shall exterminate them. They are not welcome here.



Eowyn started to walk away, lost in thought, but Aragorn called out to her, stopping her in her tracks.

: Do not act in thoughtless haste, Eowyn. We needn't engage them in battle here and now.

Eowyn's eyes widened in realization, and she whipped around to face the ranger, staring at him almost disbelievingly. Without consciously realizing it, she walked back up to him, her eyes transfixed upon his.



: Lord Aragorn...

she breathed, staring at the ranger as though she was seeing him for the first time.

: Ah... Eowyn...? Are you well? Your complexion has paled... And you look as though you have just beheld a wight.

Eowyn blinked, then her face reddened as she remembered herself.

: Ah! M-my apologies, Lord Aragorn...

she stammered nervously, blushing red as beetroot.



: It is nothing... I just remembered something, and I lost sight of myself... I am sorry if I upset you...

Aragorn gave her a curious look at first, a spark of... something... in his dark, hard eyes, which seemed as though they could have plucked the innermost secrets from her mind. But then they softened, and he smiled.

: I see.

he said, and no other words were spoken.

Okay, so you guys have already seen most of this level already, so now that I've got the spur of the moment plot out of the way, I'll just skim over what's left of what I played up to.

There was really only one significant difference from what you guys saw in my previous attempt, and that is



...that I used...





...Shieldmaiden of Rohan...





...a LOT.

So thanks in large part to gratuitous abuse of SoR's defensive buffs, Eowyn managed to reach the forge in considerably better shape than last time.



We sell the arrows and sandals because we don't need 'em at the moment. And now we've reached another equipment choice. Eowyn has two new items in her inventory to choose from. The wildman's leather gloves, which as you can see give a nice bonus to strength as well as a +2 to her melee armor rating. But they also come with a not inconsiderable penalty to accuracy.

To refresh your memory, here are the gloves Eowyn's currently wearing:



Ugluk's half gloves, which give less strength and do not contribute anything to her melee armor. However, in exchange they give +1 to health (which equals +4 hp and +1 sp), and as half gloves they also give a base +2 to accuracy, so that's something to consider as well.

Personally, I'd usually go for the half gloves, but I'm letting you guys decide. Because why the fuck not.

Anyways, the second new equippable for Eowyn to choose from is this:



Boiled leather, or cuir bouilli, gives a very nice for this early in the game melee and missile armor rating of +6 each, though it gives no other bonuses.

Still, compared to what we're currently wearing,



the boiled leather is nothing to sneeze at. Still, the bull's cloth shirt does also give a small bonus to strength and health.

Ultimately, though, it's up to you guys to decide!

now excuse me while I go back to being lazy

Boiled leather and half gloves. LP back on!

Seconding the vote for half gloves and boiled leather. Glad to see an update :)

I'm thirding the vote for half gloves and boiled leather.
AND BOOYA AN UPDATE!!!

eeee stop you guys are makin' me blush

An update is in the works. (read: I am resizing the screengrabs now, so I will hopefully maybe possibly get around to actually writing the update at some point today)

BTW, do any of you guys know of a less vexing alternative to the VBA's in-built screenshot function? Because it really bugs me having the screenshots uploaded half out of order because of the wonky way VBA sorts them. that, and it gets old manually sizing them up one at a time on imgur

Check the Sandbox thread, I know people have recommended screenshot programs there. As for resizing, I like XnConvert.

Read that as "Hope you guys lick it." Oh yes, I will~ what is wrong with me

Thank you very much~

Broken Forum.

And I suppose I should probably get to actually writing the next update, ahahaha...

Since the vote was unanimous in favor of the boiled leather and wildman's leather gloves, that's what Eowyn is now wearing.



And since I doubt we'll have any more use for those half gloves or the cloth shirt, I pawn those off for a bit of scratch.





: That's better. More money, and more inventory space. Everyone's a winner!

I don't sell off the t-sword though, mostly because I didn't even think about it. And Wilson isn't going anywhere.

: Good boy.

Anyways, after that's been taken care of, we are off.



Eowyn, armed with a seething hatred for uruk-hai, cuts a bloody swath through the wandering bands, slaughtering them like a wolf among sheep.



And thanks to a combination of abusing SoR like nobody's business and looting the occasional fruits or mushrooms from enemy corpses, Eowyn manages to fight her way through the remaining uruks. Soon enough, she finds herself within sight of a suspicious cave.



: Hm... There's something fishy about that cave...



: A-welp. There's no point dallying. Might as well charge right in!

And charge in she does.







When the screen transition fades, we find ourselves outside once more, and quite a bit lower in terms of elevation.



Of course, there are uruk-hai down here just off screen.

: Not for much longer, if I have anything to say about it.







The poor bastards don't even stand a chance, though they do manage to scratch Eowyn up a bit before she kills every last one of them.

Of to the right, however, Eowyn spies something curious.



: Ehhh? A lever? Way out here in the middle of nowhere?

: ...I wonder what it does...

Like a true adventurer, Eowyn flips the lever out of morbid curiosity. Nothing seems to happen at first, aside from a nifty panning effect that is really hard to convey in screenshots, but then...







...it summons several uruk-hai and two restorative pools (one for hp, one for sp) back at the start of the level.

:... huh. I guess it doesn't anything.

...not that Eowyn has any way of knowing this, hehe.

Vexed by the seemingly functionless lever, Eowyn turns around and heads back through the cave/tunnel.







Then, she heads down to a lower part of the level that I had completely forgotten about, passing just out of view of the recently spawned gaggle of uruks.



There was nothing of interest, though, aside from a treasure chest, so I'll just skip straight to the end of this session. translation: either I forgot to take screenshots of it, or they got gobbled up by digital gremlins

ANYWAYS. We've once more got some equipment to choose from. Yaaa~aay!



The maiden's heater shield, which represents an upgrade from our current buckler in terms of block rate



The "dastard" sword wink wink nudge nudge, which has decent base damage, as well as a trait we have not seen yet! As you remember, the t-sword was a two-handed sword. Well, the dastard sword is a hand-and-a-half sword -- basically, it can be used one-handed, BUT, if you have nothing in your off-hand, it gains a damn decent damage boost.



And lastly, the crown, which has an identical armor rating to the hood (the weakest kind of head-armor in the game) BUT gives a whopping +5 to courage. Putting it another way, that's +20 sp and +5 hp -- nothing to sneeze at this level.

So, those are your choices. Vote wisely, now~!

Of course we have to have a crown! Even if it didn't have any additional bonuses. Crowns, people. Crowns. Also voting for the maiden heater shield and the dastard sword.

Maiden's heater shield because of its name, and crown because of course.

But "dastard sword," really? Would saying "bastard sword" have bumped up the rating or something?

Agree with the two above (Nerys, I assume you're voting for the (B)asterd sword, I can't really tell for sure?).

Agree with the above. But you sold the half gloves when we said to use them...shenanigans!

eh? No, you guys said to use the leather gloves. The half gloves are the ones she'd had equipped before.

Actually I was wondering about that myself, and I beg to differ

Shenanigans! :)

...Well now don't I feel silly.

Well, disregarding my apparent inability to reading comprehension, guess who's using a shiny new screenshot program~~~?



Yup, that's right. I am~

So anyway, here's Eowyn's current equipment.



And her stats.



Now to maybe finally finish this level~

You know, I haven't mentioned it until now, but for some reason this game has no sound on my VBA. It's not the emulator, I don't think, since no other games have that problem. Not that it really matters. Really, I was just using this a tangent to segue into that I was listening to this



on repeat while I was playing.

But anyways.



After putting on the crown and changing up her equipment some more, Eowyn once more set out in hopes of clearing the last of the uruk-hai from the area. She headed down to the center of the level, where there were a number of uruk-hai lying in wait, activating SoR before charging boldly into action.



: I am Eowyn, princess of Rohan, daughter of the house of Eorl.



: My arms are strong, my heart is stout.



: My feet swift, my eyes keen.



: My shield broad, and my sword sharp.



: SO RUN FOR THE HILLS, YOU LITTLE BITCHES!

: I seeeee yooouuu.



: FUK

: Hahaha! This is too easy!



: Oh, yeah~ I rule~ It's mah birthday~ It's mah birthday~

: Fire at will!

: ...eh?



: ...eru-dammit murphy

: Okay Eowyn, don't overreact. They're just archers. Close in quick, and they're defenseless as long as they don't have anyone covering them.



: See? What did I tell you, me? That's one down already, and there's not a scratch on me. Us. Well, I know what I mean.



: Hah! And that's another. And to think, I was worried this might actually be hard. HAH!



: OW OW I SPOKE TOO SOON OW FUCK OW PAIN



: Okay... haaa... haaa... That's the last one over here... Now for the bastards who shooting me in back.



: OH GOD. NOW I KNOW WHAT A PINCUSHION FEELS LIKE. D:
AND THERE GOES ANOTHER KINGSFOIL
D:

: OH THANK THE VALAR FOR CONVENIENT LEVEL UPS even if I'm not sure if we Rohirrim actually know of or believe in them



: THERE. Now tell me that's the last of them. oh who am I kidding of course it isn't



: So. I think this is actually my first time taking on one of you green armored guys on my own. Shouldn't be too hard, right?







: WELL. I see you're not dead yet. And I'm pretty sure I hear one of your buddies trying to sneak up on me. Probably to shoot me in the back, going by recent precedent.

: Let's see if I can't fix that.



: Well, that's one down. took him friggin' long enough.



: Now to take care of that bloody archer.

Unfortunately for Eowyn, not even a well-placed Broly gif could change the fact that red and green uruks hit like motherfuckers and can absorb a good deal of punishment before going down.



: Stop shooting me, damn you!

: Stop shooting yourself.

: Okay, that's it. YOU ASKED FOR IT.







: Are you dead yet?

: No.

: *double-checks hp total*

: Oh, no, wait. I guess I am. BLEARGH.

: Okay, good. I think that's the last of them. Wait, why is the camera--







: OH COME ON.

Dipping into the health pool to restore her hp, Eowyn prepares for the climactic showdown.



: Okay, this guy is probably the toughest one yet, but if I play this smart he should go down without too much trouble.



: *proceeds to flail wildly for several embarrassing seconds*



seriously, I completely bombed while fighting this guy



even remembering that I had double strike did me little good in terms of not making a complete ass of myself



this went on for a while



but thankfully Eowyn had was a fine bad enough ass to beat the guy even with my complete brainfartery



: When you get there, tell your buddies I said hi.

: Now to loot his corpse.



: Wait, what was that?
: Treasure senses... tingling...



: EOWYN AWAY!



: It's in here. I know it is!



: YESH



: AND DOUBLE YESH



: OHGOD WHO TURNED OFF THE SUN

Okay, so that's basically it for this level. Finally.

As always, we have more equipment to choose from, though I'll narrow down the choices a bit since there's so much.



First, there's the torn mantle. It gives -1 to defense, but it also gives a very rare +5% bonus to dodge.



Next is the Rohirrim flat axe. It has a marginally higher base damage score than the dastard sword (discounting the latter's potential two-hand bonus) and gives +1 to courage and +10 hp, though it is less accurate.



Lastly is the armourer's buckler, which gives +2 to melee armor but has half the block rate of the maiden's heater shield.

The rest is all just mediocre crap that I'm not even gonna bother putting up to a vote.