Pooh Baseball - No other 2013 game will make you rage this hard.

It's a game on Disney Japan's site. It is theoretically for children.



Clearly it was made by sadists who hate children.

I've managed a few home runs so far, this is my best one.



DARK SOULS

COME AT ME BRO

You guys posting shots really have no idea... talk to me when you get at least to Owl, nevermind Tigger.

God, I hate it when I go through everything noscript is blocking and allow it all and shit still won't load.

Works in IE. Nifty. So far my high score is 2982 points. I have no idea what that means.

Edit: Okay, I am now at Owl. I feel like Japanese children are laughing at me.

God almighty, what a terrible interface metaphor.

Got to Tigger. Fuck you, Japan.

Man I was raging at Tigger like yesterday. I will persevere and beat the smile off his face. Eventually.

Since I can only assume level 8 is Christopher Robin, after Owl and Tigger I don't even want to imagine what perverse way he thrusts his balls into my Pooh.

Christopher Robin is a hell you must witness to believe.

Made it to stage 2! After 7 , yes 7 tries...

Thats it for me....

Can't get past Piglet. The look on his face when he defeats you... ugh! So smug!

I keep fouling but yeah, this pretty wonky.

Bullshit.

Piglet's bloody carcass argues to the contrary.

Onward!

I couldn't beat Kanga and Roo. I never thought I'd have so much hatred towards Pooh characters.

If you can't make it to the Dark Lord and witness it for yourself, you can see a Japanese player take him on in this video.



That is some dark wizardry.

I must have used the wrong controls, my Pooh moved so slowly he was nearly immobile.

Upgrade Speed, the bottom one.

KYM is on it.

WHAT?!

...you can upgrade stuff?

Same game, in English:

http://www.gamesloon.com/free-sports-12/baseball-games-16/winnie-the-pooh-home-run-derby-54790.html

Yeah, if you go to Status. It's power, contact, and speed. You only need a few points in speed, then focus Contact I think. Power I think may be completely worthless as it seems to me it only upgrades the distance you hit homeruns, but I don't think it will actually turn a Hit into a Homerun, though I could be wrong.

It's amazing how much easier this game is with a few points of contact.

Twenty for twenty on Piglet!

TONIGHT WE DINE ON BACON!!!!

Distance leads to more points, I think?

and more points lets you buy more upgrades!

14 off Owl. This game is mean.

WAIT, THERE ARE UPGRADES???

Tigger is a bastard.

25/28. I HOPE SOMEONE TURNS YOU INTO A RUG.

edit: 26/28. My eyes hurt.

I don't know how to play Dark Souls, but I got some beginners luck on this.

Round 1:
Longest: 135.6
Total: 514.1
1205 points

Round 2 (Elephant):
Longest: 139.4
Total: 646.5
2,646 points

Then the music drove me insane and I shot myself in the head.

Think the power increases how far the ball will go, which can make a difference between scoring a homerun and the ball landing too close to count.

edit: i did better at Little Busters; although i did get to Kanga and Roo before finding out there's cheats upgrades.

This game is surprisingly effective at exposing and punishing every little lapse of attention. As soon as I start looking at the score, calculating my percentage, or thinking about anything at all, I start missing. So far the best I've done is 34/50 on Christopher Robin -- it definitely feels like it should be possible to beat him, but I can't stay in the required meditative trance for long enough.

Played for about 10 minutes and gave up at Rabbit, because fuck this game.

Power does help, incidentally; it turned a lot of my near-misses into homeruns.