The general fashion/style/please dress me thread

Because it has come up before, specifically about shoes, and then about one particular poster, so I figure a thread just for the topic of "I want to dress better, please halp" would be good.

You may want to designate it men, since all our style experts are men, and women's style is a labyrinth of horrors.

I will do no such thing. I buy my wife her handbags, shoes, scarves, and cardigans. It's a matter of education, not gender. I snark at your preconceived gender roles! =)

Cross-posting from other thread because this thread is now the threads thread.

So my awesome friend with good taste helped me make two good choices. I had the shirt and tie, but with a simple vest and new coat (both hella on sale) I went from SOMA-startup-coder-wish-I-was-still-in-my-twenties-hoodie-asshole to financial-district-Jesus-Christ-I'm-almost-forty-at-least-I-can-dress-nicely-for-evening-things. In the unforgiving fluourescent bulbs of my office's only mirror:



So I feel like I've upgraded myself from total disaster area to Rivet City/Megaton level.

So, first off, well done! A proper coat can dress up or down an outfit fabulously*. Men have a propensity of getting too baggy...everything...and coats are one of the worst. Yours looks great. The monochromatic color scheme says "I'm a serious man" but the light colors also imply that you're not a black expresses the color of my soul dipshit. Bravo!

Tie looks great. The color matching is fantastic, honestly. You get shades enough to provide contrast, but nothing is too stark or brazen.

Obligatory nitpick: for historical reasons which are retarded, men are discouraged from buttoning their bottom buttons on vests or suit coats.

Related historical note: the reason we had 3 piece suits is because the vests provided warmth before the advent of central heating. Once central heating became prevalent (mid-20th century) the vest became a non-essential part of the wardrobe and has fallen out of favor. That said, suits themselves are rapidly falling out of favor since we don't need them for the warmth and most people just don't know how to wear them.

P.S. I will reserve final judgment since I didn't get to see your pants or shoes. If there are Chuck Taylors beneath that counter you're dead to me.

* I will use terms like this when discussing style thank you

Protip for women: figure out what colors work for you. This is not subjective. There are certain colors that don't work well with certain skin tones. For example, if you're very fair skinned, avoid camelhair, beige, sand, tan, etc. It turns to moosh and your features disappear. My general rule is that if you have darker hued skin, for less saturated colors. If you have very fair skin (nordic, platinum blonde, etc.) then use super saturated, vibrant colors (jewel tones). If your complexion has an undertone (ruddy skin, olive skin) avoid that color, it will amplify it. Olive complexions should avoid desaturated greens, and if you have ruddy skin (including from bad skin) avoid red/pink like the plague, it will only accentuate it.

Protip for men (most women already know this): LOOK IN THE MIRROR ONCE BEFORE YOU WALK OUT THE DOOR. Most men, especially if going somewhere where they don't think they'll encounter women, just don't give a shit about appearance and will go through the motions then walk into work with, I dunno, toothpaste on the front of their shirt or a patch of facial hair because they shaved by feel and missed a quarter-sized portion.

Sometimes, olive on olive-undertoned looks good, though.

well how the heck does one figure out what colors objectively work for you? I hate this crap. My own favorites tend to be jewel-tones and the olive-y, mustard-y, brick-y type colors (I'm sure there's a name for that tone family?) but no idea if they look ok. Fair (but not Nordic) skin, face is ruddy, dark blonde/ash hair.

Is there some kind of service that isn't bullshit?

There are rough guides out there, but in general you just have to hope someone can provide objective feedback (or just ask at a decent shop).

It's a lot to deal with at first. When I went through my own transformation from cargo-shorts-sandals-XXL-t-shirt to not-a-slob I was overwhelmed by the amount of information. Luckily, it's like math -- you learn it once, and then you're set, unless you're going to chase trends, which is never a good idea.

Earth tones.

Off the top of my head I'd say these are the major color groups: saturated (jewel tones and bright colors -- generally work well for most complexions because they'll contrast with anything, just make sure the base color complements), pastels (desaturated but colorful, works well if you're tan or darker skinned), earthtones (depends heavily on the color and your skin complexion), and monochrome. Men always lean towards monochrome because colors frighten us (because there are rules of what colors go with what other colors and that can get complicated in a hurry). Colors + patterns = stark terror.

Note that some of the rules can be gamed a bit by introducing a contrasting element. For example, you may like a sweater that matches your skin tone -- a significant no-no since you'll look washed out -- but one way to dodge is to wear either an undershirt that's visible above the collar that acts as a contrasting barrier. OR, wear a scarf that does the same thing.

Ladies, shall we discuss the right and wrong of crewneck, swoop, deep-V, and turtle necks? Because that's one people fuck up all the time.

And hats. Women should wear more hats, it's a great accessory for any outfit, practical (keeps you warm and keeps the sun off of you in the summer), and can take any normal, bland outfit and make it pop.

Actually, choosing the right thing to make an outfit 'pop' is a topic unto itself.

You're reading it, lady. =)

Speak for yourself. My favorite work shirts are a) solid pink and b) purple gingham. I am also fond of colorful ties. Pants, though--pants should be monochrome. Let's not go crazy here.

I'm generalizing. The fact that you know what 'gingham' is means you're not my target audience =)

General rule of thumb: if a man knows what gingham, herringbone, houndstooth, twill, pleats, darts, and collar stays are, they're pretty up on the dressing thing.

As for pants -- I've never been able to wear colored pants ever. I think that's an attitude thing, if you're going to wear red pants -- hell, even white pants -- you have to own that look.

Oh, another protip: store displays (and catalogs) are preconfigured with outfits that you can just buy. If you don't know what you like or how to construct an outfit, there's no harm in getting a combo that you like. Eventually you can figure out how to put together your own.

J. Crew has a lot of great colorful stuff. But make sure you dress your age, it's awkward being that 38 year old in A&F. And if you're 20, then you're probably not Ann Taylor's target market.

Isn't it that Korean dude's song?

Gingham

Gangnam:

I would just like to say that I greatly appreciate this thread.
I am not the type that can dress myself, but I can dress others and it looks amazing. On myself, i am too afraid to move away from black/grey, white, and navy blue. Mostly because I'm afraid of colors not working with my skin tone.

(it took me literally 20 tries to get this post to make sense.)

For a woman, dressing to your body shape is probably the most important thing. I actually have a good link somewhere that discusses how to determine your (real) body type (there are two different types of hourglass for instance, I have the high hip version) with appropriate suggestions.

I already know that I've got a serious hourglass shape with a small torso and loooong legs. It's tricky finding tops that don't make me look fat, though. :<

This is true of men too. Proper fit matters more than almost anything. Women tend to err on the side of too tight, men tend to err on the side of too baggy.

Going back to my sweater comment, if you have a long slender neck, do not wear a deep-V, it over accentuates the length and gives you a giraffe effect. Conversely, if you're a man with a thick neck and double chin, don't wear a turtleneck, it just makes it look more ridiculous and ends up giving a more bullfrog appearance. If you're a woman with a big chest, a swoop neck works well without overemphasizing the cleavage.

Pants are always the toughest, for both men and women, but women have it harder because they don't get to fall back to 'relaxed fit' jeans and they don't get the sheer number of size offerings that men have.

While I agree, limiting yourself to black/grey is, well, limiting. Yes, you can do a Dieter Sprockets color ensemble and still pull it off with the proper handbag, shoes, and jewelry, but it ends up being very monotonous over time. Find another base color and then start to expand off that and it opens up a ton of options, even if it's relatively boring like dark green or navy blue.

I dress casual (no jeans) for work. Right now I get out the door most days wearing a pair of pants in a neutral (camel, khaki, black, dark gray, dark green), and a knit top or sweater with a scoop or swoop neck (I guess? a "normal" round neck, like a t-shirt) or demure v-neck. Mostly solids, and pretty much never any accessories. Bo-r-r-rring but fits the dress code and is easy. Not being too tight and not needing ironing are pretty much the biggest criteria in my clothing selection.

My body shape is not as easy to buy for as it was when I was thinner. Top-heavy, thick-waisted, relatively narrow hips, and short enough to benefit from petite cuts except they never work with the top-heavy and thick-waisted part. So shopping in person is depressing, and buying online unreliable. Plus, I'm cheap. LOL.

Settle a color dispute for me.

I am Scots-Irish white trash, which means freckles and a somewhat ruddy complexion. Blue eyes. The following conversation occurred in my office a couple of weeks ago when I had to dress up a little for a workshop I was conducting.

Co-worker to me: Oh, good, you wore the purple blouse. I was thinking last night I hoped you would.

Me: I dunno. I usually avoid reds, purples and pinks because of the Irish drinking blush. I like blue because of the eyes.

Her: Nope. The blue just washes out your eyes. The purple really brings them out.

Me: Clearly you put more thought into what I would wear today than I did.

I think she's full of crap about the color. What say you, BTG, who I had no idea was gay?

:)

This actually all sounds fine, but if you accessorize I bet it jazzes up the whole outfit tremendously. Earrings + matching watch/bangles, or shoes that pop with a matching purse, along with a necklace, really can pull it all together. You want accent points, ideally more than one. Without any, it's just clothing. But wear something that shines and the whole outfit shines. I have a particular weakness for patent -- red patent handbag, pink patent pumps, etc.

Oh, I think many of us can relate.

Thankfully I think clothing companies are wanting money more than prestige, so the old school "Nothing above a size 10!" attitude that some 'hip' places have has been pushed aside now that even the average american teenager is quite a bit heavier than even 15 years ago.

Impossible without pics, sorry! But I'll make a best guess.

Hair color?

It's hard to say, because you don't want a sea of monotone, that does swamp out colors that pop. For example, if you have beautiful red hair, then don't wear a red blouse that's totally going to overwhelm that. If you have blue eyes, the key is whether there's enough 'palette cleansing' color between your blouse/top and your eyes. If you have pale skin, then you should be set. Someone with deep blue eyes, pale skin, and then a blue blouse would have a killer combo.

Purple probably works too, depending on the shade. I think a jewel tone either way works.

My wife dyed her hair bright red on a lark, and let me tell you, she had no idea the disaster that it would cause to her in terms of finding things in her wardrobe that would match. No more pink or orange, for starters.

It's pretty funny shopping for shoes or handbags for my wife, because a man in the women's section is like throwing chum to sharks. They assume you're a wounded fish and sales people will either come try to save you or devour you (or both). But I know exactly what preferences my wife has for handbags (type of pocket, shoulder drop, closure, material, brand, etc.) and shoes (e.g. no platforms, no heels over 3", wedges are ideal, no clogs/mules, no sandals, ballet flats are great depending on style). And I know her sizes across numerous brands.

So when I have very specific opinions about brands and sizes and styles, the assumptions are humorous. You can tell from their expressions everything from "He's totally shopping for himself" to "His wife doesn't know he's gay, does she?"

I want to explain to all the men who sit in the lounge chairs glumly browsing their phones while their wives are in the dressing rooms that I have a superpower, and it can be learned. You know your wife's preferences for handbags and shoes (assuming she's a woman who cares about that -- if she's not, then learn what she does care about and know that shit cold), and you're set for life.

Light brown, going gray. I am Peppermint Patty after she got old and let herself go.

I do this all the damn time. I'll be sitting on the train, and see my reflection in the window and suddenly be aghast: toothpaste stains, unshaven spots, all of it. But the worst is that 90% of the time I never bother to iron my clothes.

Can I use this thread to also ask BaconTastesGood wtf Esquire is thinking sometimes? Case in point: the worst-fitting suit I've ever seen.

That is pretty terrible, jerri.

It makes me sad that like 99% of mens fashion these days is 'slim fit' and super tight-fitted clothes. I am not exactly the slenderest person in the room, so I keep seeing all these clothes that I really like, and I'll try on a XXXXL* and it'll still be four sizes too small. Pants are the worst, though. Every time I try on a pair of pants these days, it feels like the inseam is trying to castrate me.


*hyperbole, I'm typically an XL in most 'casual' clothes. But 'XL' + slim fit feel like I'm trying on childrens clothes.

The short-pants trend is pretty icky as well. I see some pics in Esquire where perfectly good pants are rolled up so that they're short. Dumb, dumb, dumb.

This is should be the thread title.

I'm hard to fit in just about everything (aside from being fat - dimensions that aren't on the racks). I recently ordered a custom pair of jeans from makeyourownjeans.com and they arrived yesterday. Jeans that actually fit me is a first! I'm going to order a stack now (after I finish testing wash shrinkage). I don't know about looks, but damn, things that fit right are nice.

Yeah, you gotta ignore trends like that. Super baggy is in, then super tight fit, then short, then too long, etc. Go classic and timeless, that way you're not buying new clothes every other year.

Here's a basic rule of thumb for men's suits. If you don't know, ask, WWJBD? Because ignoring the Roger Moore years, dude always looks good.

Image 404.

So there's this awesome book called Deluxe: How Luxury Lost its Luster that talks about why so much of what we have today is the way it is.

Styles change because if they didn't, we'd all buy one set of clothes and only buy new clothes when the current ones fall apart or our sizes change. That's not a way to keep a market! Companies like Hermes and Louis Vuitton prided themselves on creating timeless classics that were investments -- if you bought a Birkin, that was something you kept forever (and still is). But then companies realized that if you want people buying your high volume, low margin stuff, you had to make them buy your stuff every year.

Now it's not just every year, it's each season. So a company like Coach, which is a lower mid level brand, has sales constantly because they keep inventory less than 90 days in a lot of cases. They implicitly collude with magazines because the magazines want ad space, and the ads are from fashion companies, and fashion companies stay alive by convincing everyone that skinny jeans or too-short sleeves/pants are the way to go.

It's idiotic. Which is why I always aim for timeless and stylish, not trendy and fashionable. Some things will change over the years due to preference (tie and lapel width), but keep it down the middle and you'll be okay no matter what.

Should be fixed? Don't know why the rehost didn't work the first time.

Dimensions that aren't on the rack? I guess that depends on where you're shopping!

I have a hard time finding jeans because I have narrow hips but absolutely monstrous thighs and calves, which means that most 'relaxed' fit jeans fit about normal, and 'normal' straight jeans I can't pull past my knees. But I still manage. So I'm curious what kind of crazy measurements you think you have (if it's a touchy subject and you genuinely can't find them ignore this, but sometimes people are like "I'm a 38/30 and they just don't make those!")

Wash cold. ALWAYS wash cotton/denim cold and air dry.

I'm with you on the timeless approach.

I thought this might be relevant here (very well made movie, btw).

I ain't skeered. Me being quasi-athletic (made clickable to protect the innocent). I'm down about 10 lbs and 2" in waist from then. At the moment: 50"/24", but I'm fat. The hip bone is 42". Short tree stumps for legs, with 20" calves. 18" neck, 50" chest. ~52 Short in a suit jacket. (First person to say "dwarf" gets it in the knee!")

I can't get most jeans that aren't super baggy past my calves. Things that fit my in the waist are always way to excessive in the rise, I think "short rise" is the phrase.

Yeah, that's a pickle. The problem is that you're prototypically apple or pear shaped (not judging!), and pants do not want to stay on guys shaped like that because the geometry is wrong. You'll either end up super-cinching your belt while wearing it a little too high or a little too low (with associated, er, overflow). The alternative, sadly, are suspenders.

Let us know how the jeans work out! If you're actively losing weight you may not want to invest too much in clothes yet.

When I identified as female I still had to buy men's clothes because of my build. I have no waist or hips to speak of. Or thighs or ass, really. No curves at all. I'm straight up and down except for a muffin top (that I'm working to get rid of) and a set of B-cups. Also, I'm six feet tall and broad-shouldered. They just don't make off the rack clothes for women built like me. Which is fine, since I don't identify as one anymore. :D

I used to wear nothing but black -- jeans, T-shirts, and boots. Lately I've gotten away from jeans and into khakis, though. They're lighter-weight than jeans,and they tend to be more comfortable. Jeans have a tendency to slide down my non-existent hips, even tightly belted. Khakis don't do that for some reason. My shirts tend to be darker colors, black or darker earth-tones, and many of them are not T-shirts. Frankly, I look a lot more adult than I ever have, which is... odd.

I'd like a good suit, but it's too fucking hot for the Hurricane State. Any suggestions for how to look good without sweating to death? I'd like to be able to dress up a little without melting, and old-people-style "Florida casual" is gross. (I am NOT wearing splashy tropical-motif shirts. You'll have to kill me first. Nor am I wearing shorts and boat shoes to a nice restaurant. WTF, old dudes?)

Cloth weight is the missing link here. If you're in tropical heat and you wear a navy blue three-piece 13oz worsted wool number over a shirt with a tight weave with a madder silk tie, then yeah, you're gonna sweat to death. But if you wear a 9oz wool or linen two-piece over a lightly-woven shirt with an open neck then everything is going to be much more comfortable. Lighter fabrics have their drawbacks of course, particularly in drape and durability, but if you're living somewhere hot then it's going to be a much more elegant solution.

Of course, who says you need to wear a suit? Linen trousers, a nice light shirt and a thin, unlined cotton jacket will work pretty much the same when you need to dress up in hot sticky weather. There's also no shame in boat shoes. You may also wish to consider bass weejuns, which go with basically everything and are ideal for hot weather.