The Problem with Politics - Let's Play Dragon Age II

I love the graphic in this DLC. It's awesome. And I really like the Chant of Light, I hope we will be able to hear it someday.

I knew about that

Well, she's a proper Lady now! She still has to complain about not finding a dress with matches her eyes.
I have a vain character, she makes me suffer with her hating of clothes she doesn't like.

Yeah, Anders really hates the Wardens XD I like how Fenris is cautious when asks him about Warden stuff XD I think that his tales about his time amongst the Wardens are even better: "Guys, I ever told you about that time where end up in a crazy dungeon where ghouls stole our dresses and we had to fight naked? And then we wore that clothes as nothing happened? It was when a talking Darkspawn wanted to do crazy experiments on us and a dalish mages killed a lot of bandits! Ah, good times. "

Seconded! I hope since it sounds like we're set for Orlais in Inquisition we will pass by Val Royeuax' cathedral.

Hm...

I think with Joyce it's a matter of when she snaps and sets her dresses on fire. All she ever wanted was to grow marrows XD

My favourite part was back when that fucking quest bugged and I lost ALL OF MY GEAR. It was even worse because when I came back I realized I'd been wearing Wade's highest tier dragonbone plate. And I had to look the man in the EYE heading back inside. Oh, the humiliation.

Oh my gosh. That eyebrow.

(If I remember correctly Anders says also something like "I'm a wizard not a magician" if you try to lockpick somethin with him).

Leandra is really sweet here. When I did Legacy in Act 1 she was bitter and sad.
Also, Carver <3

....this means Angst. Angst Everywhere.
*.* *o* *O*

NOW LET'S SPEND HOURS DISCUSSING IF THE GOLDEN CITY WAS GOLDEN OR NOT WHEN THE MAGISTERS BREAK IN.
Because thanks to Corypheus I started to think it wasn't.

I think I saw picture of that cathedral, I'm not sure if it was from Dawn of the Seeker or what. But yes, It should be awesome! And I play DA for sightseeing. Fashion and sightseeing.

Marrow?



(The dictionary translates marrow as zucchini or Knochenmark or Ruckenmark in italian. Please explain XD)

I never got any bug like that, thank God - GAME, DON'T YOU DARE TAKE MY RINGS/TRINKETS FROM ME.
...and Herren didn't kill you for that?

BOOOOOONESSSS

He does X3

What I really like for Legacy is definitely how much it changes the personal stuff depending on the act. Act 2 is my favourite act to do it in, and typically early on. MotA is less reactive, I've found, since it's not as much Hawke's family story.

Carver friend is a sweet lad.

Angst had to occur sooner or later! IT'S NOT LIKE THE GAME HAS ANY

I think the sentence 'It was supposed to be golden' indicates it was always Black, or Phee-Phee is misremembering. I love how Bioware always keeps it juuuust a tad ambigious whether the Chantry is right or not, here and with the Urn of Sacred Ashes especially. In a way I hope they never say what's right one way or the other.

The environmentals are so gorgeous. DA II is even more beautiful than DAO in that aspect.

A form of pumpkin, I think. Poirot has retired and is growing marrows, bored out of his mind, in the famous novel The Murder of Roger Ackroyd.

Oddly, Herren was pretty okay with it. I guess he knew no one can defeat a game glitch.

Haha, yes. "What do you think I am, magic?"

Okay, Legacy banter. Let's try again. Stupid browser.

Hawke: Someday I'll visit a place with no ancient evils, horrors, devouring plagues, or insanity. Maybe a beach?
Varric: The day you go to the beach is the day an armada of angry demon pirates show up.
Hawke: I've got a bad feeling all of a sudden...

Hawke: When you tell people about our escape from Lothering, why do you make it seem like I have food all over my face?
Varric: You're larger than life, Hawke. I had to give you a few flaws just to make you approachable.
Hawke: Did you call me fat?!
Varric: Yes, that's pretty much how I tell it. "Hawke rolled into the fray like a gigantic pudding, covered in gravy." It's more dramatic that way.
Hawke: Does it have to be gravy? Couldn't it be chocolate instead?

Hawke: I'd like to know who this "Corypheus" is. With a name like that, I know he's bound to go "Muahaha" at some point, I just know it. And really? More blood? Why can't it ever be spit or a lock of hair?
Varric: You really want to encounter a spit mage?
Hawke: For variety, sure.
Carver: You worry me, you know that?

Hawke: I'm surprised you agreed to come, Varric. You hate being underground and you avoid the Carta the same way you do the Merchant Guild.
Varric: There's no way I'd miss watching you make these motherless nug-lickers cry. If you wanna punch a few stalagmites on the way there, that's good too.

Anders: More Deep Roads. Why did we agree to do this again?
Varric: This isn't so bad, Blondie. You could be losing more coin to the elf in a game of Wicked Grace.
Anders: *Groans* At this rate, I'll still be paying him back when I'm dead....

Anders: One good thing about being trapped in an ancient underground prison... not a lot of templars. There's a bright side to everything.
Hawke: You should set up shop. It's no worse than your current digs.
Anders: Good point.
Hawke: Just wait.
Anders: I could be quite comfortable here actually. Clean the taint off the floor, maybe hang a few pictures. It might even be a step up from Darktown.
Hawke: I've never argued against you being in prison.
Anders: Hmm. At least this one was built by mages...

Anders: So, templar. Is the order everything you wished for? Pithed any good mages lately? That's what you do now, right? It must wear on you, given your lineage. No wonder you're quiet...
Carver: If I could take you without risking my sister, you'd never see daylight again. Clear?
Anders: Oh, yes ser, please ser!

So, I watched the credits to end. Very last remark?

"This product may contain commercials or real-life product placement."

I don't know about you, but if Boob Staff is real, I'm not sure this world is worth living in.

"After a long day of battling the forces of evil, all a Hawke needs is a nice can of Dr. Pepper to cleanse his/her soul of demons and revitalize his/her spirit! Buy one now and get the following additional ingame items: the Boob Shield with real bouncing action, the Qunari Shaft Staff with increased rate of fire and a better range than any human shaft could ever reach, and last but not least, the Spanking Paddle Sword for when you just want to teach those naughty apostates a lesson!"

He's too precious <3
That's why I hate you, young people in Star Trek XI

MotA is well placed in Act 3, possibly after completing the romance subplot because banters <3 But yeah, it's more like a "and then Hawke and his friends went on a school trip and it was fun" DLC, which I like because it's nice going outside. Everyone is nicer.

And I approve of it. THIS GAME IT'S SO HAPPY AND FULL OF KITTIES AND RAINBOWS EVERYWHERE, IT MAKES ME SICK.

I thought that too. I kind hope that we'll discover more about it soon or later - maybe in DA IV? - because there is so much stuff going on about the Maker and the Creators and stuff that I'm excited. That's something I also like about this saga, there are a lot of different plots going on.

What about the Urn of Sacred Ashes? The only mysterious thing that I remember about it was when they disappeared if you didn't kill Brother Genitivi. Too bad I kill him anyway.

Yeah, I kinda hope we will visit Ferelden again in some future games, because I'd like to see some of the old places with the new graphic. Like Ostgar. It was already so damn beautiful the first time I saw it.

Oh, then it was zucchini (I think they are also called courgette in english?) indeed! I thought it was something about fashion I didn't have any clue about.
I like how mighty detectives decide to spend their retirements years doing this kind of things.

Herren is a wise man. I can't imagine how he lives with Wade otherwise.

Fifty Shades of Grey Warden.

(I was drawing this but then I realized that I still suck at male anatomy. Let's just say that I can see how you play "The Sadist Templar and the Naughty Apprentice" now.)


...wait, what if the "real life advertisement" was that letter about your little soldier you get later...?

My inner Andraste trembled in anticipation as Arishok Grey propped me up on his throne, shackling me to it. "I shall teach you the ways of the Qun," he whispered, his voice low and sultry. I felt my knees quake at the sound of him, my inner Andraste showing him her rear like a Mabari in heat. "Yes," I breathed, biting my lip to keep myself from moaning. "Tell me all about...the Qun."

Not a big Star Trek XI fan. For that exact reason. I miss DeForest XD

I agree. It's best placed in Act 3 as a bit of a breather in the main plot, too. Legacy is pretty dark all in all and lays a lot of heavy lore out. In MotA it's like everyone, as you say, wants to enjoy themselves and be silly a bit. TUR-NIPS they may be.

I'M VOMITING RAINBOWS AFTER LEGACY THAT MUCH IS FOR CERTAIN

I'm dying to see the payoff of the Seeress statue. If there's no payoff I'll be very sad XD. I actually remember my big gripe when they announced DA2 was that to me DAO was a story about the world, and making it protagonist-centered seemed a mistake. Instead, we get a game even MORE about the world, which is another reason I really love it.

I bet Orlais is at least pleased they waited until the engines were optimum before going there, but I do miss Ferelden. DA2's biggest downside is that you never really go anywhere but Kirkwall except in the DLC.

Courgette is what we call them here, anyway, that or squash. Christie always did love the clichées XD.

I imagine being Cam Clarke voiced has to do with it. Sky sure is patient with weird crap happening around him, too XD[/quote]

I am either amused or horrified. I sincerely don't know which.

You know you love it. Everyone loves Arishok Grey.

I wish I could like this more than once.

Davian, what did you do with those tags XD

I miss all of them. But yeah, as soon as I saw rebel!teen!Kirk I was already hating it.

I enjoy them being funny and talking about their hobbies - like cooking - or some stuff not plot related.

I HATE SEEING HAPPY PEOPLE ALL THE TIME

DA2 make me sad because I spend a lot of time thinking about how would have been if they could go to Ferelden. Watching Merril in the Bracilian Forest, visiting Lothering ruins, passing near the Circle, being with Varric in Orzammar...
I really can't get over it.

Bloody Orleasians, they get all the nice things. Except Aveline, now she's ours.

Kirkwall also was a static city, so that's a pity too.

I never talked about courgette first in english, so I didn't know. That's what LP are for!
That sounds like a total reasonable retirement plan XD

Yeah, but Sky had Zhu's help!

But He doesn't make love.

Also, I love you especially for the inner Andraste.

I put a ( where a / should be XD.... should be okay now.

I... was told I'd love it. When I saw it, well... I wrote a 16 page essay on my experience of watching it and it was mostly about complaining XD

It's a credit to the characters just how interesting it is to see them just kick back and chat.

Talk about wasted opportunity... as much as I'm sure Varric would gripe about Orza.... wait, now that's even more sad XD Merrill being at home would also have been a nice sight. I feel so bad for her clan having no Halla and being stuck...

Aveline not being an LI is the dissapointment of the game. I guess she's just not fucked up enough in the head.

Kirkwall is pretty, but it gets very stale after a while. It's BETTER than being stuck in the Deep Roads, but then, what isn't?

LPs are insanely educational. Not even just about the game being played or horror literature being read. I didn't even know until now what those marrows were because a lazy Danish translation of Ackroyd just called them pumpkins.

ZU HELPS EVERYONE IF THEY HAVE A ~*DESTINY*~

I've been told something like "It isn't too bad" by I fellow friend I tricked into watching the entire TOS
I'm still angry about it.
Just saying.

And I wrote an essay too. So much things wrong with it. And I'll still watch the next one because there is Benedict Cumberbatch. The things I do...

Yeah, you just care enough that you're okay with watching them doing absolutely nothing other than chat among themselves. Of stupid things. I would love a cutscene of them playing cards.

Yeah, what happened to her clan is just sad. And you can only make it worse! Thank you, Bioware.

I would really like to watch how it is for him going to Orzammar. I mean, he heard about it since he was a innocent little dwarf, so seeing how he actually deals with it would be great. It was nice seeing what happened in Legacy about his ancestors. Or going to the Anderfels with Anders. Or just going for a walk with romanced!Fenris in Ferelden, I always liked how interested he seems in knowing about your past, because he's curious about how it is having one. Or Aveline's house! She had a house, right?
The fact that all the characters in DA2 are immigrants with a lot of issues in the past makes all this kind of things interesting. Even if Leliana, Sten and Zevran talked a lot about their homeland, I wasn't that curious about going there with them. In DA2 Hawke is an immigrant as well, so they all know how it feels.

There were a lot of nice things that they could have done in Kirkwall too, like Merril living in the Alienage, Anders going to the market, or Isabela's gang of thieves or how explaining on earth Fenris has friends elves. No, really, where? Why? How? Is that blood magic?
And I really wanted to see Aveline's dinner in Act 3. It sounded like fun.

I'm kinda happy about not having Aveline, because considering how things goes, she can do better. But why Varric, why.

The Brecialian Forest can be worse than the Deep Roads. I kept getting lost. No, really, everytime I think about it I just get sad. And I hated the Deep Roads so much during my first playthrought that I chose a King and then I run away forever. I didn't even explore the Thaigs properly, I just wanted to leave and never come back again.

Ahaha, I should really update my LP

I didn't knew about marrows having an english name period. I just never talked about it. I can talk about videogames with abominations and Old Gods but I would have failed at reading a menu XD

I HOPE YOU'LL ENJOY BABYSITTING, ZHU.

This. I had a thing at work where I couldn't figure out the right adjective I needed, so I just arbitrarily selected one and went with it. And misspelled it. When my boss asked me about it, I said "I only ever heard it spoken, so I gave it my best go and missed a vowel, as happens so often in life" and he asked how can I spell 'repercussions' but not 'serious'. I said that's what happens when you learn your languages from the internet (and video games). And that's why I can spell 'arbitrary' but not 'vowel'.

I think my angry ranting conclusion was it was a fine action movie. And I hate action movies XD

Next up on destroying my childhood; Tintin movie.

GUESS WHAT. dA to the rescue! Don't ask me why Aveline is in her Prologue getup.

I never saw a game with so much DLC potential and they stopped after MotA, I just... I wanted to beat my head into a wall. I'D PAY FOR A DLC OF ARRANGING FENRIS' BIRTHDAY PARTY IF I HAVE TO. MY MONEY, TAKE THEM AND MAKE MORE.

True... very true. No BW character makes very good significant others, do they?

I try to make it all about finding shiny armour and I still damned hate the Deep Roads. My first run of it was a true catastrophe and it marked subsequent runs forever. That and it's so damned LONG. I cope by giving myself free moments after completing each area. Varric has it right. People living there on purpose are crazy.

Yes, you should OwO

The first movie to destroy my childhood was a Harry Potter one, I think. Probably the third one.

Action movies which destroyed my favorite things...
I shall not speak about the last movie about The Three Muskeeters. I won't. I will be strong and pretend it doesn't exist.

Oh, that's fine! And of course you have a pair you silly Sebastian, you are a healthy young man.
...
Wait, what we were talking about?

I found this too.

TAKE ALL THEM. WE WILL EVEN BRING YOU COFFEE AND MAKE YOUR LAUNDRY.
YOU CAN'T SAY NO TO PEOPLE WHO WOULD MAKE YOUR LAUNDRY.

I'll never get over this game ;_;

Well, it depends. Consider that all the ones talking about marriage and babies were in ME3. And look at what happened.
I think that it takes a special kinds of person. I remember once reading an essay wrote by an Jacobmancer about how Jacob was a good LI from that point of view - that was before ME3, of course. Aveline just wouldn't work with Hawke I think.

I like the Deep Roads now, probably because I just go there sometimes and I'm more used to it. And I really like the Broodmother part. But living here? Then again, I won't live in Orzammar either. I need the sky, mountains and fresh air.

Tomorrow: mental hospitals for everyone![/quote]

I know I can just not watch these things, but then you have people bugging you about how it's the greatest thing ever and then we have Sofalisa in the Fatal Hearts thread suffering through 50 Shades of Grey to be able to say 'NO, IT IS NOT, AND I DID GIVE IT A CHANCE'. They can exist, but I don't want to acknowledge them.

That was the actual one I went to find! I love how it seems to end in strip poker every time XD

I blame Izzy.

I think I just fall for the unpolished, rushed sequels. DA2 is TSL all over in a way, rushed to finish, not the best reputation, GREAT CHARACTERS. It's nice it stopped on a higgh, but Witch Hunt and Leliana's Song were my favourite DAO DLCs and it would have been nice to have some Song-like DLC when the game emphasises companions so much.

Opportunities wasted ;_;

Look at what happened indeed... I swear, it's like Bioware wants us to make and care for a character and then force us into murdering it or making it suffer. I bet the final DLC would have been about Hawke pulling a full style Ketojan on themselves.

I'm a bit claustrophobic in the sense I get stressed and frantic in enclosed spaces and like my vertigo, it manifests in games as well, so narrow passages always makes for shoddy gameplay on my part. In DAO it also leads to highly inapproriate calls of "HESPITH, OH THANK GOODNESS, YOU'RE STILL CRAZY AND TAINTED!" when I make it through. I think if I were an Orzammar Dwarf I'd go batters.

I love the asylum
My own padded cell
I'll stay here forever
'cause outside it's HELL!

My problem was often that I read everything, so I got the pronounciation hilariously wrong. I used to call it Cog-Knack when I read Tintin and it took my father ages to teach me the correct way to say it. I'm pretty sure I somehow mangled 'whiskey' as well. In my defence, I was 8 years old, but then it's an error I still make with new words these days. My brain-to-mouth pathway is a mess.

XD
You deserve these:

And a bit of banter to round us off.

Aveline: I had trouble with another one of your women, Isabela. She stole from a... distracted client. You're lucky she wasn't jailed.
Isabela: 'My' women? I am but a shepherd. And what free enterprise are you oppressing now?
Aveline: Theft is not enterprise.
Isabela: Opportunities insufficiently guarded. Victimless crimes.
Aveline: Except for all the victims.
Isabela: Details. Victimless details.

Merrill: The Qunari must like it here, to stay so long.
Aveline: From what I've seen, the Qunari don't like anything.
Merrill: That can't be true. They must like some things... Sunshine? Butterflies? Rainbows?
Aveline: If I spot a Qunari admiring butterflies, Merrill, you'll be the first person I tell.

Merrill: You've had many lovers, haven't you?
Isabela: Fewer than some think...
Merrill: But you never stay with them.
Isabela: No, why should I?
Merrill: But the act of lovemaking is so... intimate.
Isabela: I don't "make love." What I do is only skin-deep, Kitten. Don't worry your pretty little head about it.

Isabela: So what duties did you have? As a slave, I mean?
Fenris: Not this again...
Isabela: I heard that Tevinter slaves are kept oiled so they glisten. Did your master... oil you up? Did you... glisten for him?
Fenris: I was his bodyguard...
Isabela: Always close at hand. Always within reach. Glistening...
Fenris: You have an entire story written in your head already, don't you?
Isabela: Mmm!

I love Fenris so much. Especially drunk Fenris.

Oh, honey, you have no idea.

But.
But.
BUT. THAT BOOK. I'M READING IT TOO. IT'S... Look, I understand if someone likes it, but it's horrible. you can read the first one (maybe two if you're fastidious) chapter and then be done with it forever. Unless the writer is is the reincarnation of Dante Alighieri, there is no way it could get better. And she isn't.
*weeps for humanity*

I blame everyone. Yeah Sebastian, even you.

Opportunity completely wasted. There is only the comic, and it isn't that great, even if appreciate knowing more about Isabela.

...don't give them ideas!

It must be horrible then. I just hate that kind of places sometimes I have trouble breathing, since they're small and there is not fresh air. Like cars, sometimes.

You just want to see Holmes in a new outfit.

Lately I do a mess while writing instead. Like 'were' and 'where'. And my pronunciation was already horrible, so no problem about that :°D

Why Isabela, I love you so much ;_;

I always wonder if Isabela says this kind of stuff because she thinks it's better this way or if she really had no idea.

I just realised Paxley, the nervous templar recruit, is Emery using a much lighter voice. FENRIS IS IN EVERY TEMPLAR RANK.

Just think how much trouble we could have saved if we'd killed Javaris when Fenris suggested it!

Bad Hawke, that's what you get for not killing someone!

...and I love the Arishok.

When you think about it, there's a lot of trouble in these games that could be pre-empted if you murdered someone early on.

...

Now there's an interesting lesson.

Firstly, I sincerely miss Boob Staff. The other one may be better, but it's just not the same.

Second, just wanted to say that I'm impressed at how much work you've done here. You're chewing through the game quickly...and posting at the same time. Thanks!

*bows head* Thank you! I strive to update daily and I can assure you in... let me see... in two levels Malcolm's Honor is back on par with Hawke's Key for DPS, so in three levels it's better (it has a nice +3 to all atrributes stat that makes it always viable, granted), and by then it will return. Hawke's close to leveling now, so I think we'll have the Family Shame back on her back before the Act is over.

The game is luckily pretty accomodating to LP. I can usually say I want to finish this and that quest in a daily update and get there in less than 100 screenshots. God knows with Amsterdam it was feeling a whole lot more like a chore.

I kind of like the boob staff.

It's a conversation piece.

Another day, another batch of banter. Yes, twice in the same day, early act has so much running around doing background stuff.

Sebastian: Is this getting you any closer to your ship?
Isabela: Huh?
Sebastian: I just... don't understand why you're working with Hawke. You don't seem to care about anything we do. What's keeping you here?
Isabela: Mostly the Blooming Rose. I'm paid up through the end of the year. I'd hate not to use it.
Sebastian: The... brothel?
Isabela: What? Women can't go to brothels, too? You're just not using your imagination. Oh, look! Now you are. You're cute when you're blushing.

Sebastian: I notice you talk about... vulgar things quite a bit.
Isabela: Do you want me to stop? Do I make you... uncomfortable?
Sebastian: It was just an observation, really.
Isabela: It's a bad habit I picked up, spending years with foul-mouthed pirates. Pirates only care about a small number of very specific things: the sea, strong drink, and booty. Both kinds.

Sebastian: I used to be like you, you know.
Isabela: You used to be a woman?
Sebastian: No!
Isabela: That explains a lot.
Sebastian: My family put me in the Chantry because I was giving them a bad name. It was the best thing that ever happened to me. I found peace. I found a purpose. Before I came here, I used to be out to all hours, drinking and whoring. I didn't believe in anything except my own pleasure.
Isabela: Why couldn't I have met you then...?

Aveline: You, Varric, have a very large mouth.
Varric: And here I've always looked up to you. What is it now?
Aveline: There were fistfights in the barracks over who is the model for your guard serial.
Varric: Hard in Hightown. Riveting stuff. Everyone loves a dirty guard on the edge.
Aveline: Varric.
Varric: Fine. I'll start his big finish. Three chapters until Donnen Brennicovick retires and opens a tavern on the coast.
Varric: I sure hope he makes it. He's getting too old for this shit.

Aveline: You're glaring, Anders. Is there a reason, or is it one of your moods?
Anders: Your term as captain hasn't been particularly "mage friendly."
Aveline: I've only turned a handful over to the templars...
Anders: Every despot starts somewhere.
Aveline: And yet I allow an abomination to whine at me! Credit where it's due!

Anders: Boiling in oil.
Varric: Too prosaic. Trapped in a cave with hungry bears, right at the spring thaw.
Anders: That lets him off too easy. Dipped in molten gold and left as a statue in the Viscount's Keep.
Varric: Ooh. That's poetic!
Hawke: What are you two talking about?
Varric: What to do to Bartrand when I find him.
Anders: Any suggestions?

Varric: Blondie, I don't mean to sound critical, but have you considered a new line of work?
Anders: Such as?
Varric: Pretty much anything? I don't think "renegade mage" has a bright future. Or any retirement plan.