The Problem with Politics - Let's Play Dragon Age II

Romancing Isabela is the solution to all the headcanons involving Fenris. I'm going to try this as soon as I can. I'm sure Isabela will be wonderful at giving advice about how to break Sebastian vowes.

But if I finish it then I have to play again to keep ogling! It never ends!

I recommend it on its own merits, I really liked Izzy's romance.

Not necessarily a bad thing!

I already romanced her. How could you not? I have a lot of crush on companions in this game, and Isabela...oh, Isabela. She won my heart the first time I talked to her while playing as f!Hawke. And MotA is just perfect if you romance someone.

I already have some of their banter on my mp3!

I know exactly what you mean.

Izzy. Let me love you.

Got a bit of banter. I ended up doing a lot of running, and I think I'll only sort half the screenshots today. Might be a few repeats, I'm tossing in what I can't remember if I said before as well.

Fenris: Is there something you want, Anders?
Anders: You really don't have the temperament for a slave.
Fenris: Is that a compliment or an insult?
Anders: I'm just wondering how your master didn't kill you.
Fenris: How have the templars not killed you?
Anders: I'm charming.

Anders: Do you ever have any regrets?
Isabela: About what?
Anders: Anything? Everything? I can't figure you out.
Isabela: The past's past. I learned that young. If it can't bring you gold or giggles, what's the point in dwelling on it?
Anders: Maybe the chance to fix a mistake? Make things right again?
Isabela: Eh? Our mistakes make us who we are...
Anders: That was almost profound!

Anders: You do have an opinion on mages, don't you?
Isabela: Of course I do. I just don't feel a constant need to bring it up... *Sigh* Mages don't worry me. And I don't believe the templars when they say I should be worried. I'm more likely to be shanked in a bar than eaten by an abomination. You can hear those coming a mile away: "Grr. Argh!" "Oh, is that an abomination coming to eat us? We should get out of here!"
Anders: .... Abominations don't go, "Grr. Argh."
Isabela: They don't? I should rethink the whole thing, then!

(Nice little Buffy reference there along with every mention Tuesday means death and mayhem. I do approve.)

Merrill: You could get another cat, you know. There's one in the Lowtown market with a litter of kittens ready to wean.
Anders: You don't pay attention to templars, Qunari or politics, but you notice kittens?
Merrill: Templars, Qunari, and politics don't meow and attack your feet when you're buying food.
Anders: Are there any tabbies? I'd like a tabby!

AND GUESS WHAT

Anders: Is that supposed to be Andraste's face on your crotch?
Sebastian: What?
Anders: That... belt buckle thing. Is that Andraste?
Sebastian: My father had this armor commissioned when I took my vows as a brother!
Anders: I'm just not sure I'd want the Maker seeing me shove His bride's head between my legs every morning...

Aveline: How are you so successful with men? You're not that pretty...
Isabela: Cast a wide enough net, and you're bound to catch something!
Aveline: *Laugh* At least you're willing to admit it...
Isabela: Trust me, I've heard, "Get away from me, you pirate hag!" more times than I care to count.
Aveline: Doesn't that bother you?
Isabela: Why should it? They don't know me. I know me.

Aveline: You're right.
Isabela: About?
Aveline: About knowing who you are: I'm the captain of the guard. I'm loyal, strong, and I don't look too bad naked.
Isabela: Exactly! And if I called you a mannish, awkward, ball-crushing do-gooder, you'd say...?
Aveline: *Calmly and firmly* Shut up, whore.
Isabela: That's my girl.

That last one's a personal favourite. I love Izzy and Aveline's growing friendship arc.

I know where this is going!

I completely approve of bringing Isabela along because this quest with her around is fucking hilarious. It's funny on it's own, but the banter becomes a hundred times better.

This is so true I would like it more than once if I could.

Donnic is so pretty that I want to kill him.

Also, yay <3 This quest is gold. Pure gold.

I guess the Kirkwall National Guard doesn't have any corporate policies about engaging in relationships with your direct reports, eh?

Also, best Hawke expression ever.

I agree. Moments like these, I am so happy they went with an emoting protagonist. In general, The Long Road is really one long quest of programmers amusing themselves with getting Hawke to make as many amusing faces as the models were capable off. There's a real winner coming up later.

But before said winner, now for something complete different.

A man with a tape recorder up his brother's nose.

... start again...

Another small WTF moment. Battle starts and apparently Merrill is holy.



I have no idea what combat effect of hers does that, and it has to be specific to her because as you can see Fenris looks normal. The party consisted of me, Anders, Fenris and Merrill. I am deeply curious as to why she's suddenly glowing.

Say it with me, guys: DAMMIT, ANDERS. u_u

DAMMIT, ANDERS.

Now, I know I should be all emotional about poor Anders going Vengeance-shit, but the devastating combo of belt buckle banter + the long road = me lolling like lolling person on lol pills.
Aveline actually get rival point if you bring Izzy along - can't blame her, Izzy is squeezing the situation for all it's worth. I can't wait for that banter in act 3 ("did he earl your eamon?")

SHUT UP, ANDERS.

This quest always makes me want to punch Anders in the mouth.

The aftermath itself is okay - he is at least appalled, but start Questioning Beliefs right after and all that self-righteous BS about how Justice is ALWAYS right and sparkly and amazing really made me want to slap him in his dumb face with a particularly large trout. I do partly ask for it to be frustrating when I rival him, but... like you say, a punching option, ME style, would be VERY welcome at that stage _ _

Anders used POUT


It's not very effective...

Joyce is more partial to brooding. He's using a faulty tactic.

Yes, he have seen Carver, he should know by now Joyce has built immunity to pouts.

I, however, had no such luck. Anders, you poor demented baby~
He's actually lucky the Seb romance suck so much, otherwise I'd never take him anyway. I usually try to avoid Seb, because it breaks my heart how I can never cup his joining, so I have to shank Anders' Jory (yes, I have the entire list in my bookmark tabs, and I look it up for reference. There's a banter like that in Origins too, isn't there?)

Oghren, I think. One I do remember is "Donning the velvet hat." at which point Alistair says "You're just making these up, aren't you?" and Oghren goes "Nope! Been saving 'em!"

Yes, with Oghren and a romanced Alistair. "Been saving 'em." Edit: ninja'd!

"Satisfy a demand of your Qun" is my personal favorite.

That quest made me hate Anders, but as he's the best healer, and my main was a warrior, I had to use him anyways. Irritated the hell outta me.

Honestly, after Bethany kicked it I mostly just said "SCREW IT" and did without a healer and just chugged a bunch of potions.

I have nightmares while playing about not having enough friendship/rivalry points and letting Anders kill Ella.

GODDAMIT ANDERS, why you don't listen to Merrill when he talks about how demons and spirits are the same and to Fenris when he talks about Tevinter.
GODDAMIT MERRILL, why you don't listen to Anders and Fenris when they talk about demons and blood magic.
GODDAMIT FENRIS, why you don't listen to Hawke and Anders when he has a point - well he actually listens, still.
GODDAMIT SEBASTIAN, why you don't listen to Anders when he talks about how the Chantry is apathethic.
GODDAMIT, WHY ALL OF YOU DON'T LISTEN TO EACH OTHER.

Seriously, this quest is worse when replaying. Also I hate Karras and Alrik, too bad killing Karras requires a specific pattern.

ALSO, GODDAMIT DONNIC. I love him, but the first time I discovered about the line different about the gender all I can think about was "BUT AVELINE IS SO MUCH BETTER, WHY SHOULD I GO AFTER YOU" XD He thinks that Hawke is hitting on him in the barracks regardless of Hawke gender however.
And it was so awkward. Especially if you already romanced someone, because Hawke spends all the previous part of the quest acting as if he/she is a master of seduction XD

I love this quest.

I also like "Arl you Eamon".

"Is that all you do? Dwell on the negative?"
"No! I - well, all right, yes. Fair enough."

Fenris does listen to Hawke! Which is yet another reason that I love him. <3

Unfortunately, the instances in which Anders has a point are mostly drowned out by MAGESMAGESMAGESOPPRESSIONOPPRESSIONMAGES.

/showing my bias

I have this wonderful thing going on with Anders where I love him, then he talks and then I want to punch him, then I love him again, then I end up eye-rolling all day with Varric while Fenris and Anders keep arguing forever.

I'll add something about Anders tomorrow because it's 3 AM here.

The only reason I still love Anders is because of Awakening... and Ser Pounce-a-lot


Edit: ehehehehe, remember this?: http://browse.deviantart.com/?q=Ser Pounce-a-lot#/d3dfgl9