WHY IS THERE NO DRUNK THREAD

that's hot.

What the. I'm going to type this slow so it will have good spelling even on my phone. Met the old friends tonight sat Cigar Bar on Montgomery street in the city. Drank so much denims. I was inspired by this thread too and looked up the god ideas.

First had a rob roy with house booze, it was ok but not my type. Then decided time to remember the old school and has a old fashioned with bulleit rye, a classic and I like the cherries. Finally s closed out the night with a reliable old faithful a k a whiskey sour with Makers Mark and can you believe this? Here is a bunch of bullshit. The sour citrus mix sucked to high heaven! Studiously this is the worst sourt mix in recent memory. So I had three decent drinks and acrappy finale. Bummer. Also I am at montgomery Bart and I seriously have to pee like tom hanks in League of their Own. That was a funny scene with madonna timing his pee. Also one if the ladies from the program came out tonight and I think she is just such a great young woman.

When well the train come here? Ok here it is I hope this works over the network. I don't care
M

I want to invent a thing so you can pee discretely and no one will see you pie. For example you can sitr on a park bench and attach the hidden pee device and them you can pee in it and out goes to the ground but no one will see it. That won't work in the Bart train because you are surrounded by people and they we'll small the pee but in general the idea has merit. Give me your kickstarter feels you bastards!

Also when I sit in the bart and hear someone say a word like "portfilio" I go into instant sober mode and listen to why their strategy is a bunch of shit or maybe is the rare diamond in the field. This skinny bald fuck with his cute little goatee makes her want to punch him and his "blah blah is blowing up" and tell how the Aeon21+shift6 hedge fund will pwn his mom's ass although she is a moved lady who has value unlike douchebag mcgillicuddy.

Oh he just said data analytics and big data sets and excel add fuzzy matching aggregations, s I think I might have to data analyze the velocity of my cheap Paylees shoes in the fuzzy aggregation of his ballsack. Our that can be Aoen's job for the hedge funds haha. Build a pivot table on DEEEEEEZ NUUUUTZ. Man I miss hardcore rap. Thank god Public Enemy got their shot today.

In conclusion sjofn the death warrior is my favorite name on BF. Macarthur stop has good 3G service I hope third posts NO REGRETS. I owe ryan mm a beer too

As I was walking around Times Square last New Years freezing my ass off with no bathrooms around I started thinking about that. What if you could circulate it through tubes pressed against your skin as part of a coat? Warm yourself up and piss discreetly at the same time. I call this clothing line "You're In Bliss." No one wants to work on a prototype with me.

Tell me more!

I drank ALL THE SANGRIA tonight and yet am not even buzzed wtf body y u have such high tolerance sometimes. ><

Ugh.

i need a shotglass for christmad
eyeballing it is a bad idea

MulMizu via Skype:

hey man hey
i am trying buyt
my fingersa anre noodles and i can't make them oh okay NVM NOW THEY WANNA TYPOE THE RIGHT HTING
i just i try so hard
to not haev noodle fingesrt and then it doesn't work

Ditch the pants. Nobody wears pants when you're that rich, because pants are a tool of the man.

I spent about 2 hours tonight experimenting with cocktails made out of this stuff for our xmas party this year:


That'd be Eau de Vie de Douglas Fir... AKA brandy made with actual christmas tree buds. I realize it's a bit "on the nose", but I couldn't resist. After many failed attempts I think something pretty straightforward like Gin, Simple Syrup, and some of this stuff and you're all set. Maybe a dash of lemon juice. One cocktail called for grapefruit bitters, but that shit just took over.

The kicker is you drop a currant and a little sprig of rosemary in there and then... then you're really drinking christmas spirit. I'd take a picture, but if I make another one I might not make it. I;ve had way too many tonight, but you need to suffer for art sometimes, eh?

Is there a spending too much on shots for two strippers achievement? I am sad and pathetic

Did I post that?

you poist ed that bro
sdon't worry
no judgign here

YUSS

Sigh. Don't judge.

Too much. Thrre whiskey soura, two vidka plus blue cutaco thing, now three scotch shots from the"rating bar". More like drunk bar! Penguins are a thing though.

They day that someone pooed on this bart train but I can't smhell it. Go home poop, you're drunk!

Man, crappy d ate tonight. Ok have to take this to the relationship thread though. But still too much whiskeds means you can't smell the bart poop even when the drunk girls giggle for the while trip.

No judging, but you get bonus points if they were hot.

I think I'll be staying away from tequila for a long, long time.

I would like to be drunk right now. It's been that kind of night.
Unfortunately, doing so would only extend the that-kind-of-nightness, so I guess I won't.

In case of the very small possibility that people are confused by this, she's (mostly) talking about the Zafehouse: Diaries LP going on here. It's a bit disturbing that I can pretty much understand everything except for the Spanish and what I assume is a Chilean political reference, and I do agree that librarians are useless and somebody should do a Hatoful run at some point. :3

The spanish bits are either cussing or cheering, as far as I can decypher them. It's hard to decypher things when you are frowning this hard. The political reference is best left obscure, though.

I'm surprised you understand this, though. I'm struggling to and I wrote it in the first place.

I should note that I'm not usually that bad when drunk. I just had much more than I should have.

While falling out of my seat earlier in a stupor, I apparently held my dog in my lap and whispered to him, many times, that he was the best bro in the United Nations and that we should run away together to fight crime in Peru.
No, seriously.
My mother reported this to me.

I think maybe I should reaaaaally invest in a shot glass.

MulMizu, have you been spiking your liquor with ketamine again?

And then some. :)

Ya know, maybe it is because I am exhausted and had to put on the "No worries here. I did not have beers and Yaeger Bombs. I just watched the football game." face this morning for the wife and kids, but I cannot come up with a way in which I could be more pathetic. :)

It is hard to know which of the relationship/depression/drunk threads to enter at times. How 'bout a "Stupid shit on which you spent money that you don't have" thread?

If you start one, I'll post there. When I get hypomanic I buy all kinds of stupid shit with money I don't have...

Holy damn I drank alot last night. Three whiskey sours, two of this house drink involving citron vodka and blue curacao, the three "Scotch tasting" shots (something "smoky", something "honeyish", and JW Blue Label), and some decent cab sav. And we had sales guys... sales guys! ... there who were claiming to be tipsy after like two Heineys. Man, my liver is either super-awesome or about two seconds from turning to ash.

Managed to get a decent low-light phone pic of the penguins who, I believe, were not drunk.

Port wine time bitches!

Damnit, I knew I was forgetting something while I was running errands!

You knwo what? I might like port wine the best out of all the drinks ever. It has the best two flavours, sweet and bitter. And the little glasses make me feel like a dignified lady aor somtheing.

I've never had port...

I don't know if it's crazily expansive since my parents paid for it (heeeyoooooooooo), but you should really give it a try.

Somebody please remind me that having a drink is not an appropriate response to today when I'm already on Percocet. Logically, I realize this, but it helps to hear it from someone else.

Don't you fucking do it. It is a bad fucking idea.
also i love you.

Put water into a cocktail glass and pretend you're having a martini.

Thank you. See, I told you it helps to hear it from someone else.

...stoned, depressed, worried, and stressed to hell is not a great combination.